Please help me make this more interesting! I've been struggling to write this essay and I wanted to try to make it informal but somehow it came out formal. Any advice would be great.
Virtually all of Stanford's undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate - and us - know you better.
Dear Roommate,
I'm warning you now; I am bringing my 70 watt speakers and subwoofer because I love music, especially when it's loud enough to drown out my bad singing. I listen to all sorts of music, so I'm sure there is something you'll like. I also like to talk a lot; my roommate at camp told me to be quiet and go to sleep because I was still trying to talk to him at 2 in the morning, so I apologize ahead of time.
But in reality, you won't have to deal with me too much because I get cabin fever really easily and so like to stay out and do things rather than stay at home. I don't like to cook so I'll probably eat most my meals in the dining halls. Of course I'll go to class, but I will do most of my studying in the library in some secluded corner. I enjoy staying fit even if I eat like a fatty so I'll be spending a lot of time either running, in the gym, or at some sports practice. In among all of this, I will certainly be making friends (hopefully you included) and spending time with them because I think that downtime with friends is the best way to relieve stress and have some fun.
If you can't tell, I love doing things, especially ones that are new to me. I would love it if you were a lot different than me so that you could show me new experiences that could develop into hobbies and with a campus as diverse as Stanford's, I'm sure this will happen. With Stanford's laundry list of activates, I know I'll never get bored and will always be experiencing new things.
Because I am out so much, my living space tends to suffer a bit. I hope you don't mind my bed not being made or my clothes not being put away. I'm messy, but not a slob; you'll never find a box full of half-eaten pizza under my bed. One thing you won't have to worry about with me is waking up early because I certainly enjoy my sleep. That doesn't mean I will sleep until noon, but I won't be waking up at 6 if I can help it (I've had twelve years of that, enough is enough!)
Your (busy) roommate,
Daniel Abel
If you can't tell, I love doing things, especially ones that are new to me. I would love it if you were a lot different than me so that you could show me new experiences that could develop into hobbies and with a campus as diverse as Stanford's, I'm sure this will happen.
Because I am out so much, my living space tends to suffer a bit. I hope you don't mind my bed not being made or my clothes not being put away. I'm messy, but not a slob; you'll never find a box full of half-eaten pizza under my bed.--These two sentences give me the best idea of who you are. They seem the most honest and the least crafted.
When I was doing these prompts, I tried addressing the letter to one of my friends who I had not been in touch with for a while. It helped me to make my essay less structured and crafted. Try to think about the fact that you are writing to a future friend. You don't introduce yourself by giving a list of activities or your resume, right? Instead, you jump in with something that you love to talk about--fave music, food, thing to do during free-time, etc. Try to include an anecdote somewhere in the essay; it might tie it together or give you more of a focal point.
