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Personal Statement - Most important invention, and more.


chinhnguyen7 2 / 3  
Apr 26, 2009   #1
Please review my PS and give feedback.
Your help would be very much appreciated.

Q1) What do you think is the most important invention recently made.

Among many inventions of our modern world, the Internet stands out as an amazing development with its effects on almost every aspect of social life. The Internet has greatly transformed the world in unimaginable ways, bringing the different parts of the world into closer touch with one another than ever before.

The primary, and arguably most noble, intent of the Internet is to assist in mankind's pursuit of knowledge. The rapidly increasing information source, together with the ability to exchange knowledge faster than ever before is opening a whole new environment for learning and researching. Prior to the Internet, people might spend all day long on finding needed knowledge in a library. Today, with the assistance of the Internet, we can find what we need quickly and conveniently. Students' knowledge was once limited by the resources available in school or local libraries; nowadays, they are able to access a nearly infinite number of resources via the Internet. Students also have chances to discuss what they have learned, share ideas, and exchange knowledge with other people all over the world by means of interaction through email or forums; and distance is no longer a concern.

Furthermore, the Internet provides people the equity that they do not have in real life. In a face-to-face encounter, people tend to judge others' characteristics based on their first impression of others' looks. On the contrary, the Internet helps us to understand a person through their ideas, their very own dispositions, but not the outward aspects. In the real world, many people who are shy rarely speak out and thus do not have opportunities for interaction. Via faceless online interaction, they will feel more confident to contribute their ideas to the public. The Internet has created a virtual world where all people, no matter what their genders, ages, races, or statuses, are welcome to express their opinions, share ideas, and interact with each other.

The Internet has triggered many innovations in many aspects of life. With the Internet, trading, communication, finance, and so on, become more convenient than ever. With just a mouse click, customers can stay home and get their shipments delivered direct to them; emails take seconds to arrive; information flows of finance markets are kept updated. However, just as every aspect of life, the Internet does have some unhealthy sides. Today we sometimes hear about the Internet's impacts on privacy, intellectual property, crime, security, and so on. But the fault lies not with the Internet itself, but rather with human's intentions to misuse the facilities that the Internet has provided them with.

With all the reasons mentioned above, the Internet irrefutably deserved to be called 'the most important invention recently made.'
Q2) what do you want to study in the future and why? Do you have any experience related to the areas of sciences (for example: competitions, summer school programs, etc.)

For years, I have maintained an intense interest in Computer Science and I hope to pursue it in the future. I, of course, take immense enjoyment from the act of programming. This activity allows me to apply the inherent beauty of algorithms to computer languages, create small applications like schedulers for daily tasks as well as large ones like those that regulate network interactions on the internet. From the very beginning of my attendance in a Specialized in Informatics class, I realized just how much I enjoyed computer science, particularly because it so effectively explains so many wonders of the modern age. The more I study this science, the more I want to understand, apply and manipulate it.

In junior high school, I was selected to compete in the citywide Mathematics contest, thus I had participated a school's Mathematics program. In high school, as an Informatics Team's member attending in the national contest, I participated to special training courses in which I had the chance to apply the beauty of Mathematics to Informatics, creating a special blend of the two sciences.

Q3) list and describe significant events in your life:

Thirteen (13) years old (2nd year in junior high school): Met my inspiring math teacher - Mrs. Mai
Before I met Mrs. Mai, I had studied without any particular interest. However, she taught me how to find study motivation in each subject, to understand them deeply, not only the superficial things as the way I learned before. Ever since, I have seen each subject, particularly Mathematics, as an intriguing mystery waiting for me to discover. It was her who encouraged me to pursue Informatics study in high school, the newest yet the most interesting subject I have learnt.

Sixteen (16) years old: my first charity activity
Moved here: https://essayforum.com/undergraduate-2/visiting-hoa-sen-charity-shelter-6525

Eighteen (18) years old (3rd year in high school): won National Award in Informatics
The national award is an important milestone in my student life. It is a recognition of my efforts after I was chosen to participate in the nation contest. Through the training courses, my intellectual ability was challenged to grow in the research-style study. After a long study progress, having experienced difficulties, even failures, I was grateful to see the day my enduring desire to succeed paid off.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Apr 26, 2009   #2
Prior to the invention of the Internet, people would spend all day long on finding needed knowledge in a library.

With all the reasons mentioned above, the Internet irrefutably deserves to be called 'the most important invention recently made.'

I, of course, take immense ...

network interactions on the I nternet.

This is very, very impressive. I think you will do well and be well-recieved by the schools to which you apply. Congratulations for being so smart!
florazhou 5 / 24  
Apr 27, 2009   #3
Thirteen (13) years old

Hi
Why not put correct year before your age?Let people know this things in a clear way?

Hope this helpful!
sanjaygir 3 / 3  
Apr 29, 2009   #4
Below I have corrected some minor grammer mistakes to the best of my knowledge

In junior high school, I was selected to compete in the citywide Mathematics contest, thus I had participated in school's Mathematics program. In high school, as an Informatics Team's member attending the national contest, I participated in special training courses in which I had the chance to apply the beauty of Mathematics in Informatics, creating a special blend of the two sciences.

The Internet has triggered many innovations in many aspects of life. With the Internet, trading, communication, finance, and so on, has become more convenient than ever. With just a mouse click, customers can stay home and get their shipments delivered directly to them; emails take seconds to arrive; information flow of finance markets are kept updated. However, just as every aspect of life, the Internet does have some unhealthy sides. Today we sometimes hear about the Internet's impacts on privacy, intellectual property, crime, security, and so on. But the fault lies not with the Internet itself, but rather with the human's intentions to misuse the facilities that the Internet has provided them with.
marine 2 / 4  
Apr 29, 2009   #5
How much time did it take you to write this essay? I think in real test, you should write only 2 ideas because you only have 40 mins to write.I see that you present both bad and good sides so your writing is quite long (more than 400 words). But remember, you write to pass the test.So pay attention for the time limit.:D
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Apr 30, 2009   #6
That seems like good advice. I bet it is a very stressful test.


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