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My Statistics Personal Statement (GKS Undergraduate)


poseidonchild 1 / -  
Sep 15, 2019   #1
Hi there,
I am applying for GKS scholarship program and this is my personal statement. I wish someone could help me review it as soon as possible as the deadline is Oct. 10

It´s supposed to include:
- Motivations with which you apply for this program
- Family and Education background
- Significant experiences you have had; risks you have taken and achievements you have made, persons or events that have had a significant influence on you

- Extracurricular activities such as club activities, community service activities or work experiences
- If applicable, describe awards you have received, publications you have made, or skills you have acquired, etc.

PERSONAL STATEMENT essay



I believe that greatness is waiting for everyone, but only those who seek it can find it. In our life from the moment we are born until we die, we are the product of decisions, good or bad these always have consequences that we cannot avoid, but what we can do is take control over what we decide. There is only one type of decision that a man can regret and that is to not have taken one, to let events unfold in front of his eyes without doing anything, to become a secondary character in his own story. That's not what I want for my life, I want to seize every opportunity, pursue every dream and achieve every goal I set for myself.

For many years I have felt attracted by the Korean culture, although my first approach to it was through the Hallyu Wave, which I consider one of the most ambitious and best developed Soft Control projects in the last decade, little by little I discovered all the positive and intriguing aspects of this culture. One of the things that made the strongest impression on me was finding a work ethic completely different from what I was used to seeing in my own country, especially in the field of education. I clearly remember how while I was in high school, I spent a lot of time watching documentaries about the educational situation in Korea and the high-quality standards it has, internally I wanted to have access to that world and many times I found myself imitating some of the things I learned through this information.

The reason why I feel so identified with South Korea's hard work mentality is because being the youngest in a family of five my life has not been particularly difficult but I've always had to work hard to show that I am at the level of what my sisters have achieved, so working hard to meet these expectations has been important throughout my youth, things like having better grades than my older sister or learning English on my own as my middle sister are tasks that no one forced me to accomplish but that I felt the responsibility to fulfill.

My parents have always been very demanding but at the same time understanding about our education, although my father never exercised his career as a business administrator in a formal job and my mother didn't get a college degree, they always motivated my two sisters and me to make the most out of our education and get a college degree, thing which my two sisters accomplished: the eldest graduating with honors in pharmaceutical engineering and my middle sister in business administration.

As a student I did not always have the same results, during elementary school because I had Asma my parents wanted me to have a life without too many stress factors, because this was bad for my health, so I was never pressured to perform especially well in my studies which resulted in my school grades not being excellent, however this changed in sixth grade when professor when my homeroom teacher at that time began using teaching methods different from what all my classmates and I were used to, little by little through different techniques that made learning a more fun and easy experience, he started cultivating in us a liking for studying and thanks to his blind confidence in the potential that I had never seen in myself before occasioned a radical transformation in my academic performance, turning me from a student who could obtain regular grades without studying to one who obtained excellent results only by devoting a little effort. This change of mentality has stayed with me to this day and is one of the things that I will never be able to repay because of the immense value it has added to my life. During middle school I always had the first highest grade average in my class and tied in the first place of best grade average among all the school students, it was also during this time that I participated in oratory and poetry contests obtaining the first place twice in poetry and once in oratory, but what is more gratifying to me about these experiences is the knowledge that they left me with. Being a person who is usually perceived as shy or introverted, the fact of showing my teachers and classmates that I was not afraid to stand on stage and give a speech or recite a poem was a great boost for my self-esteem, it helped me develop better confidence and provided me with the courage not to be afraid of communicating my ideas freely. Academically, high school went similarly to middle school and I also got the best grade average in my class, I had no problem adapting quickly to the new workload and during all high school, I was able to maintain excellent results from the beginning to the end. Unfortunately, I only participated in one math contest in which I obtained the third place. I am not proud to mention this last experience because more than an achievement it represents a lesson, because for this contest I did not study thinking that I had no chance to win, so obtaining a third place instead of meaning a victory became a permanent reminder that I did not make the best effort possible and even if I had the capabilities I did not have the preparation to give my best performance.

The reason why I decided to study statistics comes from the desire to have a career that offers a wide variety of job options and at the same time is necessary to face some of today's great challenges. Statistics provides the ability to understand data and extract value from it, which is a very useful tool in a world where information is constantly surrounding us at all moments, it is a necessary capacity in every industry and one that cannot be simply acquired without an appropriate college degree.

In the same way that I want to work in a career that offers me a wide range of different possibilities, my personal skills are not limited to a single area. As soon as I began to notice how the world is changing more and more rapidly towards the automation of many tasks previously considered properly human and especially motivated by the documentary "AlphaGo" I began to learn through free courses and information easily accessible on the Internet some of the basic concepts and skills of programming in java, phyton, and SQL, because I consider that having these skills now days is becoming indispensable. Another way in which I spend my time is investing in the stock market, this interest arose due to the admiration I have for a family acquaintance who for some years has been investing in stocks and currencies. Because much of the information to start learning how to invest is free on the Internet, it was not difficult for me to start and the time I´ve been investing in the stock market has helped me to improve my analytical skills, concentration, focus, and self-control. Also, an activity in which I was involved from the age of 6 to 12 was dance, although unfortunately, I had to give it up to only focus on my studies, being involved in ballet and Polynesian dances clubs helped me acquired skills such as teamwork, problem-solving, dedication, and perseverance.

One of the most difficult situations in my life just occurred on July 2nd of this year, when my father, who through his work as a poultry farmer supported our family of five, was forced to close his business because an organized crime group wanted to force him into giving them part of his monthly earnings in exchange for his life and the possibility of continuing with his business. This is a common practice in Mexico commonly known as "floor collection" where members of criminal organizations threaten owners of small businesses with ending their lives if they do not please their economic demands which most of the time are very unreasonable. Because my father refused to agree with the petitions they made, on Tuesday night July 3 people from this criminal organization shot six times against our home. Fortunately, no one got hurt, but in consequence, we had to escape that same night with intentions of never coming back for the fear of what might happen to us. Although this experience is the worst thing that has ever happened to my family, at the same time it has become my biggest motivation, I probably wouldn't be applying for this scholarship if it weren't for this. It helped me realize that I want to have the best possible education to ensure a better future for my parents after I graduate. Unfortunately education of this kind in my country is only possible at extremely expensive prices that my parents will never be able to afford, so the GKS scholarship represents for me an opportunity to access the kind of education I want for my future without pressuring my parents or resigning myself to a lower quality education that would not allow me to develop my full potential.

Finally, I would like to thank the South Korean government for making it possible for so many students around the world to aspire for better educational conditions and also for receiving us in your country so that we can become productive members within it, while at the same time sharing the cultural teachings we gain from our stay with our own country.

quavius 3 / 4 2  
Sep 17, 2019   #2
I really think you're on the right track with this essay but it's missing one crucial detail. You do a great job of setting up the why you're interested in the topic, but you could expand upon what you want to use with that knowledge. I would take out the part where you mention the great deal of jobs it offers, and instead focus on your passion for the subject, otherwise your reasoning for liking the topic seems superficial.

I also recommend making the essay sequential from a first introduction to making it a hobby to experiences that made it more meaningful to what you want to achieve with the study.

Hope that helps!


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