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"Each of us strengthens all of us"....Villanova supplementary

lawalks 1 / -  
Oct 20, 2018   #1

Villanovans rely on each other

"Each of us strengthens all of us" is a concept that resonates deeply in the Villanova community. While this phrase may mean many different things, one aspect is that Villanovans rely on each other. Share a situation when you have needed help and what you have taken away from this experience.

The time had come for me to retire my plaid kilt and red polo shirt. I attended a small catholic school from kindergarten all the way through eighth grade. Growing up with the teachings of God was way of life for me. I found myself in the same building every day along with the other 60 kids in my grade and 500 kids in my school. I had found comfort in being part of a community, having a place, always feeling like I belonged. The red polo shirt and green and red kilt provided me a safe haven. But,beginning freshman year of high school I would depart from a safe space and venture into one of the largest schools in the county, into one of the most diverse schools in the country. This change came with some major consequences. Picking my outfit out for school was a daunting task, something I had never done my entire life. I thought it was crazy that kids could be on their phones in the hallways. I felt like a mino in a river of sharks. When the bell rang to go to the next class I was terrified. It was so hard to make friends. School was difficult, I understood nothing. I had no motivation to do anything at home either I just wanted to go home and curl up with my dogs. I was stressed and had no one to go to. Freshman year felt like it had gone on for decades I really struggled until the second semester of sophomore year. I had to study and put in extreme hours of work outside the classroom to see the results that I had wanted. I became more involved in school, and discovered my passion of law.

Making the varsity softball team freshman year was what really turned around my experience at Northwest. I found myself with 15 new best friends all in different grades. I began to have faces to say hi to in the hallway. A team to go out with after practice for dinner. Small things that spark a sense of community was really what started to make me feel comfortable. We were such a tight knit team. We would hang out almost every day, we would go to the amusement park, have sleepovers, basically anything to be together. What made it so special was that I had no real superior relationship with anyone. I was close with everyone, we each had our own memories, jokes, and nicknames for eachother. Our bond was inseparable. And this eventually lead to the winning of the State Championships in 2017, which had never been done before in school history. I became more confident at school, more outgoing, through some of my friends on the team I would find mutual friends, such as people who were in my classes.

Having a support system made the world of a difference. I now had the confidence to join other activities and put myself out there. Through this experience, I have realized that connections with others is what really helps you in times of need. Small acts of kindness really do make a difference. Having a support system really turned by life around, not just socially, but also academically.

Holt - / 7,609 2001  
Oct 20, 2018   #2
Lauren, is there any chance that you can pick a different topic for the prompt? The subject you have chosen to discuss in this essay is so tired and common in presentation that the reviewer will be reading at least 50 different versions of this topic during the application cycle. We need an essay that relates to the prompt and pops off the page. It needs to have recall. It needs to be memorable. The topic you have discussed is pretty much a standard essay response at this point. You want to write a memorable essay that showcases the development of a close knit relationship based on your need for support.

It may be possible to salvage this essay though. Use the varsity softball team story to depict your response to the prompt. You can incorporate a short version of being the new girl at the school and how you felt. It would be more interesting to read a fish out of water story based on your desire to be accepted into the academic community through the use of sports. Discuss your apprehension to join the team because you were not used to the set up of the system or something. Talk about how you were along during tryouts but then slowly, the other students trying out began to speak to and befriend you. This would create a far more interesting "Each of us strengthens all of us" response that will not be too commonplace in terms of response use for the prompt.

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