evaluation of my skills and also motivation to study finance
*Please describe your writing and communication skills, indicating particular strengths or weaknesses (100 words or less):
While I am proud of my ability to prepare well-constructed paragraphs that are organized logically within the framework of my paper, I occasionally make wrong-word errors that convey a slightly different meaning than I intended. When communicating verbally, I often inadequately evaluate my audience and ignore the impact of crucial details such as cultural background on the communication process. However, overcoming my language barrier at a young age taught me to show respect for others and engage in active listening. These insights helped me to become a highly cooperative person whom others feel they can trust.
*Why are you interested in this program? (100 words or less)
Aiming to advance to high management positions in leading financial institutions, what most excites me about the program academically is the opportunity to enrich my education through classes in both Finance and Statistics along with the "hands-on" experiences I will gain in the co-op program. The exceptional curriculum would allow me to develop a multi-disciplinary creative approach and customize coursework to meet my goals. Your program will best prepare me for the road ahead with the knowledge and expertise needed to work in the technical field of financial industry along with the business management skills required to open the door on a new era in modern finance.
You can frame your sentences a bit differently to create an impact.
I occasionally make wrong-word errors ... - I tend to use malapropisms in my writings.
These insights helped me to become ... - These insights made me a much cooperative and trustable person.
the interests are concise and to the point. well written
Jenny, when you respond to strengths and weaknesses prompts, always start off with your weakness so that you can give your essay a strong finish by indicating your strong points. I noticed that you focused on your weak points and used barely a sentence to indicate your strength. Don't do that. Either shorten your weak points to only the major weak point so that you can present a strong point next or present 2 negatives and 2 strengths. Whatever fits the word count. Keep it balanced or strengthen the strong points presentation by presenting more of those. You want to impress the reviewer with your strengths, not dazzle him with your weak points.
With regards to the second prompt, you should explain what makes you believe that this program and its curriculum is exceptional. Don't just use the term without a backup description or explanation. That delivers a generic response that shows an unfamiliarity with the program you are applying for. Why do you feel that this program will best prepare you for your future career? Don't be so vague in your references. Refer to actual instances that make you feel this is the program you should be enrolled in. Add more specific information when you can in relation to your career plans.