How does the University of Chicago, as you know it now, satisfy your desire for a particular kind of learning, community, and future? Please address with some specificity your own wishes and how they relate to Chicago.
AP Macroeconomics has been, by far, the most difficult class I have ever taken in my entire high school career. In Biology, the colorful molecules and diagrams of animal anatomy in the PowerPoints provided a visible manifestation of my studies. Though by no means an effortless course, I aced every test with ease as I recalled the cold, hard facts I had read in the textbook. When I stepped into the Economics classroom, however, I was immediately bombarded with the lofty language of Keynesian theory and market forces. I became even more baffled as Mrs. Barbino explained that inflation, though illustrated by a mere shift in the Aggregate Supply or Aggregate Demand curves, may have been caused by a combination of complex factors that changes with each time period. It seemed that Adam Smith himself was saying, "Claire, you're not in science class anymore," with a witch-like cackle.
As I struggled to read each chapter and work through the homework problems, my mind was working harder than ever before. While I have only managed to obtain some measly 90%'s so far, I slowly realized that I truly enjoyed the challenge of analyzing the theories of economists and applying them to different situations. No longer was I sneaking some zzz's in during the photosynthesis videos, but I was bringing my undivided attention and attentiveness to each period, eager to glean some wisdom. At the University of Chicago, renowned for its Economics department, I intend to grapple with this subject area even more. I bring to campus a desire to be unsettled by my studies, to be challenged by dense verbosity, and to flourish in an environment where knowledge abounds outside of the classroom walls. I come with a wish to be surrounded by students who are actively engaging in thought and debate, not just in a Socratic seminar, but at the lunchroom as well. I also harbor an uncertainty of whether I want to ultimately major in Biology or in Economics (or perhaps both!), but I know that whatever major I choose, I will be offered a well-rounded curriculum, supplied by actively researching faculty members and intimately-sized classes. I apply, seeking an education that will not only offer me cold, hard facts, but that will teach me how to think, even though I may not have the easiest time learning it.
I have a few questions that I would like answered...
1) Should I discuss any extracurriculars I intend to join as well? I feel that I am hard pressed for room though...
2) Are my reasons for wanting to go to UChicago too trite and overused?
Thanks for editing! :)
Hi Claire,
I am not sure if your essay requires editing -- in fact, I would keep it like it is at the moment, as it clearly is a well-written document. It is, however, slightly esoteric, and if it were not for the fact that I have read some of Keynes' work, I would not have been able to relate to what you were saying about inflation.
By all means, if you can fit it in the essay, you ought to include some of your extra-curricular activities, as it would identify you with a well-rounded person.
I liked your essay. I didn't see any changes that need to be made. I like the fact that you brought us into the essay talking about biology, only to tell us that your more difficult class was the economics courses.
--Mark :)
Claire,
Your essay is brilliant.It's well and intelligently written.It's creative and evokes emotion in very sentence.It makes a lot of sense and hardly needs alteration.My only and very slight criticism is that your reasons are rather generic and I haven't quite seen the "why Chicago".There's more "why a double major in bio+econ" rather than "why a double major in bio+econ AT UCHICAGO." Otherwise,it's excellent.I would try to relate more specifically to UCHICAGO.
best wishes:
Simba.
It seemed that Adam Smith himself was saying, "Claire, you're not in science class anymore," with a witch-like cackle.
Cool, this kind of detail sets you apart in a category of clever writers that the AO reader really must appreciate a lot...
I say don't worry about mentioning extracurriculars. This was inspired when you wrote it, and it conveys a process, letting the reader really share your process of developing this interest.
For this essay, I prescribe:
Mention the name of one professor whose classes you look forward to.
