Hi, I have written an essay for the U of C, and I am not sure about first and last part of it.
" Developing oneself is a way to make life more interesting and escape from the daily routine. I have always tried to encounter various occasions for the sake of personal boost. The experiences with my family during the summer of 2008 brought a humongous twist in my life.
I began thinking about my future goals when I finished my sophomore year in Poland. Little did I know, one April evening my, parents were going to change my plans for ever.
(....)//the body of the essay
Not only did the event match with my motivation to study various topics, but it also allowed me to get to know other students and teachers better than I would have during regular class time.
My studying in Poland had ended when I was 17. At that time, my mind was totally focused on choosing colleges and taking the admission tests. Being caught by the emigration to the U.S.A. challenged my ability to assimilate to new environments. We have never spoken English at home; hence I was forced to show my capability for studying in the new language. Despite many obstacles I faced, I proved myself that even the most unexpected and the most remarkable shifts in my life will not distract me from what I plan to achieve. As a climax of that, I am proving that I have benefited from the opportunities my parents have given me. Even though I still face many struggles, I am sure that my interests, perspectives and life experiences could help me even more in transitioning into the community of University of Chicago."
Do you think that I keep with the subject or kind of getting farther from it?