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(Submit button) Emerson 'Title of Your Life Essay' 200 words


inkraven 3 / 4  
Jan 5, 2012   #1
This is easily the weirdest essay I've ever written. I have a secondary backup essay in case this one is too...odd. Please critique this, I beg you, I will return the favor. The script format is my own creative decision.

Prompt: Much of the work that students do at Emerson College is a form of storytelling. If you were to write the story of your life until now, what would you title it and why? Please be brief

Essay:

FADE IN:

INT. LIVING ROOM -- NIGHT

The room is almost pitch black except for the blue glow of a laptop reflecting
on a young man's face in the corner of the room.

NAME OMITTED (V.O.)

The Significance of Insignificance.

INT. OMITTED HIGH SCHOOL -- DAY

We see the same young man walking down the crowded hallways of a high school in
slow motion.

NAME OMITTED (V.O.)

All my life I had been a slave to significant factors.

The young man waves to another student passing by in the hallway. A bright light
shines through a nearby window.

NAME OMITTED (V.O)

What I saw on the surface was all that existed. But my years in high school
were an awakening rather than a transition.

The intensity of the light drowns out the walls and the people so that only the
young man is visible walking into a white nothingness.

NAME OMITTED (V.O)

Now, I can finally see the colors in the darkness. The angels in the
architecture. I can finally embrace the insignificance of my own being
so that I can create something truly...significant.

INT. LIVING ROOM -- NIGHT

The young man is typing quickly on his laptop. Finally, he stops. He eyes the golden
"Submit" button at the button on his screen. He takes a deep breath, and clicks it.

CUT TO BLACK.

jadore_lamode68 6 / 37  
Jan 5, 2012   #2
OOoooo I really like this! Your response is so original and different, I feel as though it its a hit or miss which all great writing is.

I honestly can't find anything wrong with your writing. Everything is very clear and concise.
Good job!

All the best!
greeley 6 / 15  
Jan 5, 2012   #3
The Significance of Insignificance is your title right i think that should be the very first line of the essay it seems clearer if you do, but overall it's interesting i like it.


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