Here are the three essays. Please be honest! If you would like me to return the favor just let me know!
Why NYU?
I arrived at the NYU campus, and within minutes I heard three students discussing their new product that will truly revolutionize the cloud.
I instantly knew NYU was my school.
There are three necessary foundations to starting a successful corporation: the team, the education, and the opportunities.
When starting a corporation you first need the core team. There aren't many college campuses where you have business and photography students working together on launching companies, but NYU is one of the few. It won't be a hassle to find the numbers guys, looking at profit margin, and the creative guys, looking at aesthetics of products, and synergize them.
In addition to finding the right team I'll receive the right education at NYU. Stern's curriculum provides an apt business education with the liberal arts background NYU provides. I'll learn the necessary skills to run a company.
Finally, I'll be able to take advantage of this education by using the opportunities available at NYU. With programs such as the Innovation Venture Fund and NYU Entrepreneurship Challenge I will be able to apply my education and develop a company simultaneously.
I've outlined the three foundations to a business: the team, the education, and the opportunities. NYU has an ample supply of all three, so is it possible that NYU is the fourth foundation to any successful business? Well, this might be a long shot but I think yes.
Regardless of whether or not you have an intended major or concentration, please elaborate on an academic area of interest and how you wish to explore it at NYU's campuses in New York or Abu Dhabi or at one of our global academic centers around the world. Please share any activities or experiences you have had that have cultivated your intellectual interests leading you to choose to study at the NYU campus of your choice.
Growing up I always watched CNBC with my father, and I quickly became interested in the stock market and why stocks go up and down. Living at the epicenter of America's financial system will allow me to further my knowledge in financial derivatives and the impact of monetary policy on markets. Additionally, NYU's study abroad programs and alumni networks will give me opportunities to intern at central banks and research the monetary policies of foreign countries and their impacts. Furthermore, studying under renowned professors such as Thomas Sargent will expand my intellectual horizons. Together these three resources will profess why stocks move.
I'm a competitive individual by nature, and during my sophomore year of high school a penny stock promoter fooled me with a pump and dump. Since then I've wanted to "beat the market". I've spent my summers and idle time trading and researching options, stocks, and currencies in order to beat the market. In this process I've learned the ramifications of quantitative easing, the flaws of the Black-Scholes pricing model, and the economics of emerging markets, and in this process I've managed to supplement my income.
Ultimately, my passion for finance symbolizes my thirst for the unknown, and NYU's liberal arts curriculum will ultimately allow me to expand my financial and economic horizons while allowing me to find "the unknown" in other fields.
What intrigues you? Tell us about one work of art, scientific achievement, piece of literature, method of communication, or place in the world (a film, book, performance, website, event, location, etc.), and explain its significance to you.
What intrigues me is how commonplace the majority of these responses will be: listing off renowned artists, poets, industrialists, and scientific achievements that have received varying awards, yet very few will mention the daily excellences and daily successes of the hoi polloi. Therefore, I would like to mention the daily woes of my postman. He wakes up and delivers mail to thousands of houses daily, and although his work is not as glamorous as a famous actor or industrialist he provides just as much to society and works just as hard.
It seems society focuses on those who receive awards while forgetting the daily excellences and daily successes of the mass. Without the mailmen, garbage men, cooks, and textile workers the rest of society would not be able to specialize; ergo, we would all experience a lower standard of living. Their work might not be prestigious, but society should admire these individuals. Without them we would not have our Bruce Lees, Robert Frosts, and Steve Jobs. What intrigues me is the fact that these individuals who allow society to function are oppressed while reality stars, who provide no utility to society, live in decadence. This is significant to me because it's economically inefficient and it signifies the income inequality America is facing. Is it really fair while those are causing the postman to lose his job are living in decadence and are hurting society while the postman benefits society and lives in oppression? I think not.
Your middle essay is especially good. You show you have a good grasp of business aspects and your passion for this subject really shines through.
In your first essay, when you mention "the cloud", perhaps (word limit allowing) you can touch a little more on that? What exactly, is the cloud?
And in your third essay, don't start off with "what intrigues me". Just say something like "Perhaps most of the responses here will talk of renowned artists, poets, etc etc"
Read mine? :)
I like your first essay. When I read it, you showed yourself as determined, strong minded, and confident while appealing to the university also. It's strong and it's good. I can't anything wrong with it.
The 2nd essay, it really impressed me on how your knowledgeable about market and economics. You effectively display your passion, and you never waste a word. Everything is coherent. I like it. You also show how much you studied about the university and what programs it has that appeal to you. You got another strong essay. I can't find anything wrong with it.
Other than that, the only advice I have is what the others above said to me, don't use contractions.
Hope this helps.
and would care to return the favor to my Cornell Human Ecology Essay?
