PROMPT:
Imagine looking through a window at any enviornment that is particularly significant to you. Reflect on any scene, paying close attention to the relation between what you are seeing and why it is meaningful to you. Please limit to 300 words.
BEFORE YOU READ:
I'm afraid that I'm hitting people over the head with some already fairly obvious symbolism and that I needn't be so blunt, but I don't know a good way to interleave it into the essay elegantly yet still noticeably.
ESSAY
I see a large, brightly-lit concert fall full of orchestral musicians in front of a vast crowd. Violin, viola, cello, and bass, all tense and poised, wait for the first beat to drop. The players are silent, intent on making this the best performance of their career. The conductor raises his bow—the tension grows—the bows meet the strings—and a beautiful chord emanates from the orchestra. Fingertips touch fingerboards with amazing precision as the orchestra, though concentrating fiercely, is held in a trance, immersed in the music.
They only have one chance to get this right. They need to play the right notes, but they also need more than sterile precision—they need raw, human emotion, and the players give the music—alone just speckled dots on paper—meaning, purpose, and inspiration.
The symphony raises to a swell, and the crowd is entranced by its purity. The musicians have performed the best symphony that they possibly could have, and as the last note sounds, the conductor collapses in a sweaty heap as the crowd rises to thunderous applause.
Just like a performance, I have only one chance to make my life worth the while. I need to live well, but a calculatedly perfect life will leave me empty—I need the element of emotion, humanity, and feeling. Otherwise, like a computer playing a musical notation file, life can be ground down to data on a sheet. At the end of my life, I want to look back over my years with the same fondness that I afford a well-done performance—with pride and knowledge that I have done that best that I possibly could.
Holly molly that was good! Great--and I mean some damn great vivid writing there! I loved everything about it, except the last paragraph: I do not believe you only get one chance in life, but that is just me. Great writing.
One more thing:
waitwaiting for the first beat to drop.
Maybe you can give me some feedback on my writing (I really need to write like you):
...same fondness that I afford a well-executed performance-with pride and knowledge that I have done that best that I possibly could.
This is pretty great. It can b improved with a few more imagery wors so that the reader sees some specific things. "Orchestral musicians" puts a picture in my mind, but hen you name them the various instruments picture stays the same. When you mention the conductor collapsing in a sweaty heap, the picture still stays much the same, because you have not offered specific words that add definition to the overall picture of the orchestra. If you tell me colors of clothing and the type and size of the concert hall, it might make a vivid image in my mind.
This is alreay excellent; I'm just offering the idea that comes to mind.
:-)
