Hi this is just my introduction for my personal statement. The topic is of me overcoming difficulties and how they shaped me into who I am today. Please leave your thoughts and edit/correct any mistakes if you can! BE BRUTALLY HONEST. ALL CRITICISM WILL BE APPRECIATED!!
(Not showing full Osis # and Middle name here for privacy reasons)
27*****08. In high school, I am identified by this number. Right now -as you're reading this- I want you to not think of me as merely a number or another applicant, but as Tiffany M. Rodriguez. Yes, think of me as Tiffany or maybe Tiff but I ask you not a number or a teenager or even a girl. Because here I am, trying, wondering, searching of how I could possibly show you who I am in five-hundred words or less. How could I possibly set myself aside from the thousands and millions of other student applications you receive. I've come to the conclusion, that I can't. It's not up to me, it's up to the reader. In other words, you. It's how you read this 'personal statement' and what you think of it. My teachers have often said, to 'be yourself', to be genuine, and to not pretend. Well, what If being myself, isn't all that great? What If there is someone out there, hiding within the eight billion humans on this planet, just like me? And then as if I had a sudden epiphany, my train of thoughts abruptly came to a stop. Only then did I realize that it's not 'who you are' but rather what made you into who you are. The story behind you. The tears, the blood and the sweat. The relationships that ended and the ones that began. The changes. The hard times. The memories. That's what matters.
i understand that you leave an impression on the college admissioners, but this isnt really working. sure, now they know your name is tiffany, but what else? i didnt learn anything about just by reading that. you need to try a different strategy. hope this kinda helps.
