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Texas A&M Transfer Essay- Agricultural Economics/ Agricultural Business

kneeii 1 / -  
Aug 29, 2020   #1

statement of purpose essay

Essay Topic A
The statement of purpose will provide an opportunity to explain any extenuating circumstances that you feel could add value to your application. You may also want to explain unique aspects of your academic background or valued experiences you may have had that relate to your academic discipline. The statement of purpose is not meant to be a listing of accomplishments in high school or a record of your participation in school-related activities. Rather, this is your opportunity to address the admissions committee directly and to let us know more about you as an individual, in a manner that your transcripts and other application information cannot convey.

Why do you want an Agribusiness/Agricultural Economics Degree?
How will an Agribusiness/Agricultural Economics Degree help you meet your career goals?

Can someone please tell me what I need to work on to improve this? Thank you!!

"Nhi, come look at how big my luffas have grown".It is the familiar sound of my dad's excitement of his luffas. June started off my dad's construction of his scaffolding with big bags of fertilizers, and digging through dirt to begin sowing the best seeds that he has collected since last year is the summer tradition of me and my dad.

I know that luffas are his favorite, but I never really understand why he has to do that much work to plant them while we can buy them for 2 dollars at the market. Not until later that I realized, it is the only things that remind him of the days that he had with his mom. When they live in poverty and plant their own foods for a family of 9. It really made me think when I thought about how the things he does to survive poverty slowly started to become a habit and a hobby out of hardship. Dad and his plants have quietly sustained on me through time. I am the heir of his legacy. Farming is what has helped my grandma, my dad survive through poverty, and I am the next inheritor of that meaningful work.

I was influenced by my dad's life in poverty, and how farming has helped him overcome the hardest time in his life. That was when I realized that agriculture is beyond the farm, I believe that it plays an important role in the future of development that can help solve one of the global crises: poverty. I want to help people from all over the world to have their most basic needs as human beings and have better living conditions. The demand of agriculture to produce more nutritious food and to improve the livelihood of overpopulation, especially to raise the higher living standard for the poor has been rising. And I want to be a part in supporting sustainable human development in this critical challenge.

The degree in agricultural economic industries is a vibrant environment with opportunities domestically and internationally for growth. I want to utilize the degree to incorporate economics and analytical research into agriculture to understand the process of production, distribution, consumption of goods and services as well as the impact of agricultural industries have on others around me. Food is an international business that affects important aspects of life throughout the world and that is why I believe people who earn a degree in agricultural economics can become one of the problem solvers.

I originally chose Lone Star College due to my responsibilities for the family. My parents are not the brightest crayon in the box, and being the oldest daughter in the house. I have to stand up and take care of things that my parents were not able to do. By the time graduation has come, my mind has not made up to where I want to go next nor what I want to study. That is when Lone Star College came through to give me an opportunity to explore my interest, to grow and to fulfil my duty of a daughter. Now that my aunts are around to help my parents and I am getting ready to graduate with my Associate degree. It is time for me to start a new chapter of my life and I believe there is nowhere better than Texas A&M to do so.

With a diverse and welcoming facility, Texas A&M will help me to further my education of what I am passionate about in many different directions that can open a gateway for growth not only academically but personal development as well. With my determination and responsibility, I know that I can step forward to reach my ambition and I believe that Texas A&M is the place to help me to become the one who can change people's lives with positivity and happiness.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,923 3562  
Aug 30, 2020   #2
Remove the last 2 paragraphs as these are irrelevant to the discussion prompt. Not only that, but it is also a bit insulting to your parents to say they are "not the brightest crayon in the box." Such a slight insult might not sit well with the reviewer. Focus the discussion only on the target points of the questions provided. From what I can tell, the essay addressed these questions creatively in the first 4 paragraphs. It would be better if your replaced the last 2 paragraphs with a reference to perhaps taking over your father's luffa business or something. Show how there is a direct influence between your interest in agribusiness and the work your father did. Speak of specific career goals based on a personal and professional level. Those presentations should help the essay close on a stronger note than explaining why you chose the university, which was not asked in the first place.

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