can any body tell me what's wrong with this essay
Life sometimes pushes us to do things that we don't want to do. These things have to be dealt with. We could find these things in our professional lives and sometimes in our personal lives. I am absolutely convinced that we should deal and be flexible to do things that we don't want to do.
Sometimes, some of us don't enjoy our professional lives. For example, we get assignments that we really don't want to do, but we do them anyway. It is also difficult for us to work in jobs that we don't like or think they are boring, such as, working as a mail sorter or as a driver, but after a wise thinking we find that we have to continue for some reasons that we have. As a result, we should be realistic and know how to deal with those jobs. Also, we should learn how to like these jobs.
Similarly, our personal lives are full of things that we don't want to do. For instance, I really hate going to the doctor, but the necessity makes me go. Moreover, necessity makes some of us have surgeries. I think that no body wants to have a surgery, but if we have to do it, we will do, even though, we don't want to.
Finally, life doesn't always give us what we want, but with a little patience and some wise thinking we could easily deal with what life gives us. So, in the future, when we look back to our past, we don't regret taking the wrong decisions and start saying, "Had I done that thing, I would have been happier". In other words, our professional and personal lives do not always give us the satisfaction that we want because, simply, this is how life works.
Lack of clarity, focus, and specificity all spring to mind. You don't really explain why someone should learn to like being a mail sorter instead of seeking a better, more interesting job, or why people who are dissatisfied with their professional lives in general shouldn't change those lives instead of settling for them. Your doctor example is a bit better, but it isn't clear that people don't want to have surgery. I think it is probably the case that they don't want to have to have surgery, but, given the alternative, do in fact want the surgery in some sense. Your third paragraph is back to being horribly general, and therefore uninteresting. So, to improve, you would need to add many more specific examples, while simultaneously exploring what it means to want things, and how our wants can sometimes go against our needs.
thank you so much
now can you please tell me what to do to improve my ideas, my style of writing cuz all of my assignments have the same lack of clarity. Im really tired of listening to my teacher saying ''ur essays suck'' and thank u again
