Things that are extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one's self.

possible princeton supplement:
tell me if it's an okay essay? i just changed the last three paragraphs or so. and does the quote fit well? oh and which one do you like better? the one above or this one?

prompt: Using a favorite quotation from an essay or book you have read in the last three years as a starting point, tell us about an event or experience that helped you define one of your values or changed how you approach the world. Please write the quotation at the beginning of your essay.

"There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one's self." - Benjamin Franklin (Poor Richard's Almanac)

As everyone hurriedly worked on his or her assignment, I began to negotiate with it. "Work with me, just work with me. We're both trying to accomplish the same goal!" Recognizing that my pleas took no effect, I initiated a stare down, as if I could miraculously transmit mental brain waves and control its twisted byzantine mind. Nothing. For an hour every day, I fixed my eyes on its blank white face: a smirk, though not visible, was readily perceived. After almost a week of hopeless glaring and irritated clacking, I acceded to defeat, for I could strike it anywhere, anytime, and tarnish its face until black marks covered it entirely yet still feel irrevocably conquered myself. Though I was always guaranteed physical victory, because it never struck back, it seemed to always keep success just beyond the reach of my mental capabilities. Such was the beginning of my relationship with computer programming.

It first brought about the destruction of an ideal. Having been a straight-A student all my life, I operated under the belief that hard work equaled achievement, for truthfully that was all I had ever known. To try and not succeed had been a foreign concept to me until I tried to learn and manipulate the Java language.

Java was an unanticipated challenge. The class was supposed to be easy, and for some, it was. However, what took others 30 minutes to complete took me days to accomplish. First, I denied the reality of struggling with an academic subject. When it could no longer be denied, I resented the fact and became angry that my brain could not pick up on this unfamiliar, inverted way of thinking. A semester had gone by before I finally began to accept the idea that Java does not come to me naturally. No matter how many rules of the Java language I memorized, I lacked the capability to translate that knowledge into successful programs.

This presumably discouraging realization was ironically relieving. I had escaped from my pride and impractical expectation. It was comforting to know that I am simply a human being, susceptible to weaknesses and limitations. No longer blinded by a frustrated ego, I realized I had been so focused on making Java my strength that I had overlooked my natural abilities. I had ceased to understand my weaknesses and employ my strengths.

After this realization, I tried a different approach to overcome Java. My inability to grasp the inverted thought process required in computer programming is my shortcoming, but my strong people skills are my strengths. Swallowing my pride, I sought out people who could best communicate their way of thinking to me. Examining others' problem solving techniques helped me pick up skills that worked for me and ignore others that didn't. With this new self-awareness, I found a way to conquer Java.

Java forced me to take the first steps of a long journey to understand myself, and from it, I've gained an introspective and self-accepting nature.

Hey I think you've done a great job with it!
one tiny suggestion:

When it could no longer be denied, I resented the fact and was angry that my brain could not pick up on this unfamiliar, inverted way of thinking.

great essay but i feel like certain parts are rather cliche.

Miraculously, I managed to obtain all A's in the class and receive a 5 on the AP test. However, those achievements paled in comparison to the introspective and self-accepting nature I've gained.

this sentence especially seems forced. a lot of the essays i've read so far seem to struggle with this a little but i feel like a lot of things are phrased in a way to impress adcoms. i like the concept of your essay, but i would fine-tune some of the sentences :)

Love it! But you may want to take out that sentence about getting A's in the class and a 5. Admissions officers know this already; they see it on your transcript and on your common application.That part kind of seems like you're trying too hard. But that's just my opinion! Other than that, you did a fantastic job and I think this is a great essay!

I think you write well, but my one concern with the java essay is that you spend a relatively long time talking about how difficult java was but then very little time talking about how you finally overcome the challenge (which is th most important part!). By doing this, it makes you seem less smart than you really are.

Also, try to give more specific examples of how you focused on your strengths and avoided your weaknesses. That part is a little vague. I'm not sure exactly how you achieved your goal.

But overall, I like to message you are trying to send with this essay!

@nikamonster,

Is it possible that you can read a second essay I posted (it's in the original thread)? I was just hoping to get your opinion of which of the two essays you liked better.

Thanks!
Alexa

As everyone hurriedly worked on his or her assignment, I began to negotiate with mine.

This looks very good!! But i feel like you actually REDUCE it at the end by giving this sentence:
Java forced me to take the first steps of a long journey to understand myself, and from it, I've gained an introspective and self-accepting nature.

This is a good sentence, but how about one more sentence added to this so that we can adequately express your cool theme? Add an intriguing sentence at the end, perhaps one that refers again to this idea of negotiating with your work.

Then, go to the middle of the essay and add some mention of having to "again negotiate" with some aspect of your work. So, that'll be three times you expressed that cool theme, and the reader will really be able to enjoy that (and easily remember you).

:-)