11mmessick 1 / - Oct 9, 2010 #1Instructions: Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities in the space below (150 words or fewer).Track and Field was the only athletic activity I could participate in due to a hereditary health problem in my knee. I never let my partial disability get in my way of what I wanted to accomplish and quitting was never an option for me even when I got injured and pulled out for a part of the season. Dedication was a very important moral to me. I never missed a practice or a meet unless it was absolutely necessary and I never stopped working on my events, like the eight hundred meter relay.At first track didn't seem to consist of what I wanted in a sport but I found that it was more. Being apart of a team for the first time was one of the most amazing experiences I had as a freshmen. I love being apart of a team, which actually seemed more like a family.
Editor1010 9 / 33 Oct 9, 2010 #2Reword this sentence its some what a run on.I never let my partial disability get the way of what I wanted to accomplish. Quitting was never an option for me even when I got injured and pulled out for a part of the season.Dedication is a very important moral to me.I never missed a practice or a meet unless it was absolutely necessary and I never stopped working on my events, like the eight hundred meter relay. I dont like this part :/You can elaborate more on this part " I love being apart of a team, which actually seemed more like a family. "through out your short answer talk more about how working as a team helped you
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129 Oct 12, 2010 #3Add a comma to this compound sentence:I never missed a practice or a meet unless it was absolutely necessary, and I never ...Being a part of a team for the first time was one of the most amazing experiences I had as a freshmen. I love being a part of a team, which actually seemed more like a family. This is a little bit cliche at the end. Instead of saying it was like a family, can you make a clever, unique observation about the experience of being on a team? It will be e3specially great if you can connect this idea of teamwork with the field of expertise you want to enter.