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"treasurer and fundraising chair" - extracurricular activities or work experience


LeahFoti 1 / -  
Dec 13, 2010   #1
I have been the both treasurer and fundraising chair for my schools outing club for two years. Being in outing club is just one of the reasons I love going to school. To me, being an officer to a great program in my school means so much to me, and although outing club is supposed to be a fun time, I take my positions very seriously. As treasurer I maintain the clubs money both incoming and outgoing and make sure to keep accurate records. I also balance the checking account, and I am proud to say that in the years I have been treasurer there has never been an issue with the banks, as there was in the years before. As treasurer I also make certain budgets for every fundraiser, always keeping in mind expenses that must be paid off. Along with being treasure of my schools outing club, I am also the fundraising chair. I come up with and take ideas to raise money for our club and then bring them to my schools student government for approval. Some of the fundraisers that I personally came up with include a snow shoeing race were each person was sponsored, an ice fishing derby and a school dance. All were successful. I also go around my community asking for small business to sponsor or donate to the outing club so we never have to pass up an opportunity because of money. Over the years in outing club, I have become a very valued member of my schools outing club.
thakd_11 2 / 4  
Dec 14, 2010   #2
I think it will be more interesting if you could write about a memorable incident while doing these jobs. :)
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Dec 23, 2010   #3
Apostrophe: school's outing club ...

Is it supposed to be capitalized? Being in Outing Club ...

At the end here, you forgot the apostrophe again: Over the years in outing club, I have become a very valued member of my schools outing club.---Also, this sentence uses a lot of words to express an idea that could be expressed just a few words added to a different sentence. I feel like you ran out of things to say at the end. When you write an essay, you should try to have a feeling like you have TOO many ideas to share and you have to choose the most meaningful ones. You should have the idea first, and then write. If you just start writing with the intention of writing about your leadership role in the Outing Club, but you have no theme or message or insight to share with the reader... then it will be an uneventful essay. Try to end it in a way that shares your most fascinating insight from this experience.

:-)


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