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"The Twelfth Step"---Common App Main Essay


ADAKING 1 / 2  
Dec 20, 2010   #1
It's a rich country. It's a poor country.

Wipe hands with embroidered towel. Dig out Tie Guan Yin with an ebony spoon from the carved caddy to my favorite cinnabar tea pot. Pour boiling water slowly into the tea pot. Elaborate in ancient Chinese proses, on history and legends of Oolong, with a placid low voice. I knew the audiences---those young participants of 7th International Coubertin Youth Forum, from all over the world, with greatly distinct appearances and cultural backgrounds---were all captivated by my Kung Fu Tea performance. They couldn't understand my words, my gestures, but from their absorbed looks I could tell how they had dwelled in the fragrant steam, or maybe in the elegance of yore, just like I did. With pride and satisfaction gradually raised, I have suddenly realized how rich I am---Twelve thousand kilometers away from home, I am the symbol of my country China, representing the ten thousand square kilometer lands, the fifty-century history, the spirits of 1.3 billion siblings, and the culture of wisdom and moderation. Learning about tea culture for long, it was not until this very moment that I discovered what I had acquired---the thickness that a country could endow with to her descendants.

Facing outside time and space, she is rich and powerful. However, I could also recognize her affliction in the depth of heart. My generation has witnessed natural calamities like Wenchuan Earthquake, and man-made misfortunes like China's Censorship Backfires in "Li Gang" Case (Published on The New York Times, Nov. 17th). More than empathetic, I feel sorrowful because, while natural force irresistible, I couldn't understand why there are so many social inequality issues---"Affluent Second Generation" versus refugees in Sichuan, privilege versus extensive tort, irrational masses versus self-deceiving gloss of harmonious society... Yet her defects won't impair my affection and faith, because I got all I possess from her. She is headstream of my life. She is my flesh and blood. And I just could not be indifferent to what she is suffering. I want to change unsatisfactory situations, even just a little.

Interrupted by high aroma of third infusion, which provided the best taste of Tie Guan Yin, I began to divide tea and served by pitchers. The familiar smell reminded me of an obscure scene maybe seven or eight years ago, when grandpa first introduced me into world of Chinese tea. Young as I was then, I begun getting bored and impatient with his first show, in which there were as many as twelve steps, taking almost half an hour to finish. Even the gradually raised clean flavor of famous Taiwan Dong Ding Oolong Tea and his elegant movements failed to capture my interest. After the last step Conclusion, grandpa called my full name. "Jin Xue", he said, "Come to me." I knew it as a sign of anger. However, he didn't shout at or punish me. He sighed, and speak in a deep voice, "You have to know some day, that every plain thing can become special and beautiful. Like from dry tea to wet tea. But you cannot skip directly to the twelfth step. The whole process will take some time. You should be patient. Wait, keep faith, and take attempts. It's the wisdom of Tao. It's the spirit of Kung Fu Tea. And it's the reason why I taught you this seemingly useless skill. Not for showing off, but for self-introspection."

Self-introspection. Right, maybe those are the attitudes that we should hold towards everything, including our country---not complaints, desperation or abhorrence, but patience, faith and persistence. It was how our ancestors had survived and won flourish. And the same path would connect the past, present and future. Maybe, grandpa was right.

We students who get the best education are responsible for going further and solving those social problems. And yes, I want to make a difference. But rather than eager for instant success, I would build up myself into a strong thinker and pragmatist. I first have to be critical and thoughtful enough, and know why certain facts of society in China exist---how the current situations came to be, what can be changed, and how to make improvements. It pushes me to choose the path I'm stepping upon. And this time I would stick with my goal, converge every little creek of efforts into a river of good deed, and wait for the advent of nirvana. The twelfth step.

No matter how rich she is, no matter how poor she is, I love her the same, for she is my mum China. And, when I finish my road of exploring, I would be able to share not only her glory and fortune, but also her pains in the odyssey.

Performance done. Applaud burst.

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Please!!!! Any Comments!!!! Thank you very much!!!
tsa0525 1 / 3  
Dec 20, 2010   #2
That was great!! I really enjoyed how you set the scene and then ended it the same way, it really brought the essay together. I was a little confused in the beginning because I didn't realize that tea making was an art, but it made sense as I read on. It really displayed what you want to do and a lot about yourself. Other than a few grammatical mistakes, it was a pleasure to read.
tsa0525 1 / 3  
Dec 20, 2010   #3
Please comment on my essay!! Brown Supplement: What don't you know?? Music and other things...

Thanks!
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Dec 31, 2010   #4
I think you don't need to repeat "tea" here:
Pour boiling water slowly into the tea pot. Elaborate in ancient Chinese prose on history and legends of Oolong with a placid low voice. ---I removed a comma or two.

Facing I don't think facing is the right word. Maybe you mean "existing?" Existing outside time and space, she is rich and powerful.

... while natural force is irresistible, I couldn't understand why

You are a good writer: Interrupted by high aroma of third infusion, which provided the best taste of Tie Guan Yin, I began to divide tea and served by pitchers.

He sighed, and speak spoke in a deep

I am really very fortunate to have seen this essay today. It reminded me of that appreciation I can experience in stillness, pouring my attention over something simple. I am going to get some tea!


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