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Two month adventure to Naranamoozhy, Significant Experience Essay


xballerina 1 / 1  
Nov 29, 2009   #1
Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.

Every other summer my family and I climb aboard British Airways and make the familiar two month adventure to Naranamoozhy, my small village in Kerala. While I was packing for my last trip, two summers ago, the only thoughts whizzing through my head were childish and carefree ones of playing hide and seek amidst the forest of rubber trees and eating rice and curry to my heart's content. But during that eventful summer, I shed my young naive persona. By the end of the trip I was craving to gain more insight on my roots and further develop the bonds I created rather than to eat another plate of chicken tikka masala. The catalyst for this significant change was my grandmother, ammachi.

Unlike many of my friends, ammachi and I were separated by barriers bigger than age. We were separated by oceans, language, and lifestyles. Most of our conversations up till then consisted of small talk and smiles. But when I took the initiative to develop our relationship, all the barriers collapsed. The language problem was solved as my dad's translating service translated everything clearly except embarrassing stories that pertained to him. Even the language problem was solved because of my Dad's translating service which translated everything clearly except when it came to embarrassing stories that pertained to him. With the biggest barrier gone, ammachi and I had a vast new universe of subjects to discuss that went beyond the usual "How are you?". We talked about everything -- from humorous stories like when she single-handedly chased away a coconut thief, to more serious topics such as her strength to fill the role of a full-time homemaker when she dreamed of doing so much more. I learned of her aspirations to become a teacher, the amount of hard work she put in to ensure that each of her seven children had an education, and the secrets to her cooking.

With each passing conversation, I saw more of myself in her until she was almost like my mirror reflection. My family always said that we are like sisters . We both are strong-willed, optimistic and humorous as well as a little stubborn. Through ammachi I realized that my heritage and family are not things that can be limited by boundaries. These things come aboard with you on airplanes no matter what corner of the world you go to. So when my adventure was over, I brought all the memories from my trip back to Maryland with me and made new memories by frequently calling my family in Kerala. It even inspired me to create an Indian Club at my school so that others can also keep in touch with their heritage.

I wasn't sure how to tie up the essay and if I was clear enough about the impact it had on me. Thank you if you reply :]
Vivace 1 / 1  
Nov 29, 2009   #2
"The language problem was solved as my dad's translating service translated everything clearly except embarrassing stories that pertained to him. "

"Even the language problem was solved because of my Dad's translating service which translated everything clearly except when it came to embarrassing stories that pertained to him."

Aren't these repeats of the same idea?

Furthermore, you might want to expand on the main idea in the second paragraph and state the "catalyst" of your change more clearly.

Your conclusion should basically point out the impacts that ammachi made on you based on your previous statements.
OP xballerina 1 / 1  
Nov 29, 2009   #3
sorry that was a typo but thanks


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