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UMich Admission Essay: Interests and aspirations in engineering


feliciayin 1 / -  
Dec 30, 2009   #1
Requirements about the essay:
Please answer the following question in approximately 400 words.
Please describe your interests and aspirations in engineering. What experiences have influenced you?

My essay:

I have always been interested in engineering. I still remember the time when my father brought me a set of Chinese Children's Encyclopedia when I was in primary school. I read through the science and technology part of the book for so many times that I could even recite the proper nouns in the articles. Since then I became interested in science and technology. When I first took physics and chemistry classes in junior high, I showed great passion in the study and I always got the first place in the exams. Because of the reasons above, I aimed to major in engineering and succeeded in being admitted into Shanghai Jiao Tong University, one of the best engineering universities in China.

During the National Day in 2009, I worked as a volunteer in Shanghai Science and Technology Museum. My job is guiding the tourists and making explanations for them. This reminded me of my tour in Shanghai when I was in high school. Shanghai Science and Technology Museum was my favorite tourist spot of Shanghai. I spent the whole day watching and experiencing the experiments and equipments. At that time I could not totally understand the principles and theories of all exhibits. Nevertheless, I still showed great interest in them and left the museum with unsatisfied pleasure just before it closed. This time as an undergraduate student, I found out I could tell the basic theories of almost all the experiments, such as cloud chamber, diffuse reflection of the -particles and particle acceleration. Standing there explaining to the tourists just made me feel fantastic.

I feel it amazing to get to know the theories, technology and mathematics and apply them to the design and production to make our lives easier and more comfortable. I always want a better and more suitable education. As I participated in the winter program, I visited the laboratories and took some classes in the UM. After some communication with the students and professors there, I find that the education in the UM cares more about methods, self experiences and innovation. I am eager to study in the UM. In that way I can have the chance to meet the best professors in engineering, to do experiments in the best labs of the universities, to study in a brand new education system and to accept different mode of thinking, which I always want. My current goal is to be admitted into the University of Michigan, College of Engineering.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13,324 129  
Dec 31, 2009   #2
I have always been interested in engineering.

Don't start with a boring, general, simplistic sentence! Start with a sentence that raises questions in the reader's mind.

...that at age _______ I could even recite a list of all the proper nouns in some of the articles.

...and succeeded in being admitted into Shanghai Jiao Tong University, one of the best engineering universities in China. -----okay, but please add one more sentence to the end of this first paragraph, a sentence that expresses your plan and passion for engineering -- your personal philosophy of engineering and an idea about your future. Let the last sentence of the first paragraph be a powerful one that lingers in the reader's mind.

:-)


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