" An undiscovered ocean" - Qualities of leadership

Include three qualities of a good leader. Include at least one characteristic that you possess and explain how you demonstrate it. Also include a characteristic that you can improve upon and how will you do that. (300)

An undiscovered ocean lay before me, ready to be analyzed, but readily unseen. Life is my undiscovered ocean, where every day I complement it with experience and knowledge. The main content of this ocean is education and leadership. In other words, humankind must be well well-informed and know how to work with others, to save our world. My strong desire to study and to be a good leader will remain my main driving force. Since I was a child, I have been engaged in activities both in and out of school. School programs and volunteering have helped me develop qualities of a good leader. In my opinion an effective leader should acquire qualities of enthusiasm, responsibility, and be innovative.

Good leaders not born, they are made. High-quality leaders develop through a never ending process of self-study, education, training, and experience. As for me I demonstrate enthusiasm by being involved in Multnomah Teen Council, Youth Advisory Council, and Upward Bound where I am eager to work with my teammates in any project or volunteer job. In school subjects I am passionate to obtain straight A's. I practice my leadership skills by volunteering at Menlo Park Healthcare, where I help elderly people by reading, serving meals, and coming up with interesting activities. In the hospital I perform how to interact with patients and deal with the tasks that are assigned to me. I am enthusiastic to learn about all the disorders of the patients, and perhaps learn new things by observing their behavior. In return of helping others I am given an opportunity to become a more responsible individual. During the hours of volunteering in the hospital I am always aware of the environment because I realize that my mistakes can affect the patients. In Menlo Park Healthcare I began with the purpose of simply helping elderly and working with teammates, but came out with the objectives of being a good leader. While I might have been a follower prior to these experiences, they led me to notice some of my own leadership skills.

Innovation is one of the essential elements of effective leadership. No one wants repetition, dullness, and exhausted concepts. One of my weaknesses is to have new vibrant ideas that are vital in keeping the world moving forward. The way to improve upon my innovative skills is to join activities that include creative thinking. To be pensive, but powerful, and with the knowledge that I will soar as a leader I want to have consistently challenging established thought and strive to improve both myself and others.

Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm but it requires a true leader to steer the ship in stormy seas. My life has been a similar process of building a metaphorical wheel - acquiring such qualities as enthusiasm and responsibility through a variety of experiences to prepare for becoming an effective leader. However, I still have a great deal of growing up to do and many experiences left to undergo. My leadership experience and qualities that I possess will allow me to be a good leader and carry out these abilities to the next chapter in my life!

I don't understand the last 2 words of the sentence. Also, this sentence is in the past tense, but it should be in present tense to be consistent with the rest of the paragraph. No big deal, though.

Good leaders not born, they are made. High-quality leaders develop through a never ending process of self-study, education, training, and experience.-----This seems contradictory. If they are developed in this way, they are MADE.

Oh, this gets better and better toward the end. I suggest this: delete the first paragraph (I think it is the weakest paragraph), and move the last paragraph up to replace it. Then, go through and do your final draft, and come up with a new conclusion paragraph to replace the one you turned into the intro.

I love that last paragraph... I just don't like the first paragraph. :-)