am I running out of the topic? someone can help? I don't know how to send my essay in the new column, so I show it out here without choice for the urgency! sorry...
Delaware essay~
topic:
We are a community respectful of the environment. The University of Delaware leads the way in developing technological, social, political, and cultural solutions to the challenges facing our planet today and in the future. In what ways are you a steward of the environment? How will you assist the University in finding solutions to significant environmental issues?
my essay:
Through the long-term and rugged hiking, propelled forward by my loaded legs, my heart pumping loud inside, along the climbing Moxing Summit which is the highest altitude in Baiyun Mountain am I struggling to make a last dashing effort. Other participators are right behind me, all of us are striving for the complete of this mountaineering. I cannot afford to let off, not even a slightest bit because I have been in the last part of the peak. "I believe I can !" a voice deep inside me keeps shouting to me. In a kind of patient sport, there is just one aim-to win and to get the upper hand of your weakness and abandonment. To do so, it is even necessary to go beyond one's normal limit. Then the crucial moment comes, the moment of fulfilling one's prescribed objective.
I have made my point since my childhood that never give up with ease and escape the difficulties. My father had deep influence on me for my fortitude spirit. He was the oldest brother in family and took good care of siblings. Before the open-reform in China, most families lived in deep distress state, and my last generation is tortured by the lagging economy situation. Once for the poor and starvation, my father was forced without choice to stole some milk from my rich neighbors for brothers and finally was scratched and slashed to all sorts of scrapes by them. Bearing the humiliation and pain, he never give up making effort to take care of family by combating the difficulties. Even times changed, I learn from my father that the survival of the fittest.
We lived in a certain community, there sure will be competition in betweens. Meanwhile, the world turns out to be global and closed, lots of mergers, combinations and co-operations amidst countries boom. I mean it as environmental issue surrounds us. Surrounded by the wind, forest, sunshine, rain which nature bestows us, nobody will think it should be returnable or limited. Nevertheless, encircled by the political, cultural, technological and social challenges facing our earth, everyone knows the profit and return is must or nobody will trust you. To get a peace, no-war and harmonious world, we do hard to against the AIDS, Cancer, Hypertension and Diabetic, etc, these complicated disease; we make resolutions toward the disputes caused by oil, fuels, territory and trade profit; we combine with others to invent the new technology and we learn from each other during the different conflict. And I will be one of those members to do, make, invent and learn.
To grow up as an international person and be able to burden the responsibility of future facing our planet and myself, I regard it as the progress of climbing and hiking, I will never give up pursuing my terminal object-hilltop what is to hold on the pursuit of learning. Another unforgettable memory I learn the iron spirit and team work is the one week military training before entrance to high school. Indelibly, three hours' standing straight under the fierce sunshine like a real, serious and glorious soldier ingrained in my heart. Through beads of sweat I can finally see the finish line, hold on again and again, several times I thought I couldn't stand with the detestable sunshine and torpid feet so much as sit down or pretend to fall in a faint, but my perseverance, my pursuit of excellence, and my ambition to do well in everything to challenge my ultimate limit have enabled me to achieve self-transcendence time and again in my past climbing. In a row of the team, we all have the slogans to backup and inspire ourselves, one of the slogans I remember is Unity is Power which sounds like the copy of knowledge is power, whatever, we are truly impacted by this short slogan. We need to trust our team and members when racing in a match, encourage them to hold on and help them when needed.
Whether for some kind of climbing or standing-military training, to me, it is what you should stick on and trace it out. For a brave mountain climber, the sole reason for his mountain climbing is that the high mountain is there and he must surmount it. For a strong-will soldier in the battle, the ultimate goal for the war is that the triumph and fighting to the end regardless only you. For me, the sole reason for pursuing a more advanced education is that I have come to the moment of facing a new challenge and I need to conquer it. The height of life is reached through repeated self-transcendences-this is what I understand about the meaning of life. I have done so in the past and I will continue to do so in the future.
To answer your question directly -- yes, this essay is off-topic. Your love of hiking does not immediately translate into your being a steward of the environment. Your father's adventures in looking after his family, howsoever interesting, are irrelevant to the issue. The prompt is essentially asking in what ways your behavior shows a commitment to protecting the environment. It then wants to you to talk about how you will actively engage in environmentalism when you attend Delaware. It isn't really a fair topic, since it forces you to espouse a dedication to a particular political cause, which you may or may not actually agree with, but that's what they want, and the essay you have at the moment doesn't meet any of the above criteria.
Yes, like Sean said, this does have potential to accommodate the topic, but it is not quite right!
For example, here at the end, you need to change the focus so that it is on the environment:
For me, the sole reason for pursuing an advanced education is to make a significant contribution to my world -- and this includes protecting the natural environments that have provided my most meaningful experiences...
Take this theme of appreciating the earth and nature and connect it to your intended major, so that you can answer their question about how you will protect the environment -- in college and in your professional live.
