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'unusual rabbit' - UC Essay #1 My pet


beckyloo94 2 / 8  
Nov 28, 2011   #1
Describe the world you come from - for example, you family, community, or school - and tell how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

I've always had one dream for my future, and this dream is what has always kept me going in school throughout the years. Ever since I was a young child, just learning to read, I have wanted to be a veterinarian. I didn't grow up on a farm and I didn't have a household full of pets, but I was always curious about nature and animals and very eager to learn about them. I absorbed facts from the books I read, from the placards on the cages of animals in the zoo, and could never get enough information to satisfy my inquisitiveness about the living creatures around me. Nothing could be done to satisfy my insatiable curiosity for animals, and my parents always supported and encouraged me throughout my school years. They have helped me immensely with schoolwork and never let me give up when they knew I could do better. Even so, the one who could raise my spirits no matter what was going on in my life and taught me far more than I ever would have expected was a rabbit I named Whiskers. This tiny bunny that could easily fit into my seven-year-old hands taught me the value of having a creature so small trust and rely on me completely. I fed him, pet him, and cared for him dutifully every day, and he, in turn, blossomed into a loyal and trusting rabbit, with the kind of qualities most often seen in dogs. He would come when I called his name, and didn't mind being held and carried around, unlike most rabbits who will struggle to get away. This unusual rabbit gave me even more reasons to want to become a veterinarian as I continued to care for him until the day he died. That sad morning, I began to question if I could really handle being a veterinarian, and I lost sight of my dream during my middle school years. Nevertheless, the desire to take care of animals never truly left me, and it stayed somewhere in the back of my mind until I was ready to continue to pursue the path that I believe is meant for me.

(I don't know what to write after this, but I feel like I am missing a crucial last sentence that sums it up, like: The impact that the rabbit named Whiskers left on me... Please help!)

Thank you in advance for reading and commenting!

lunadonnna 2 / 4  
Nov 29, 2011   #2
Hmm I think you should elaborate more on how Whiskers gave you more reasons to become a veterinarian. Based on what you want to include on your conclusion, you meant for Whiskers to be the main point of the essay, yes? Focus more on Whiskers. What exactly made you want to continue pursuing the path to become a veterinarian?This essay seems rather short, how many words is it?

Please, PLEASE I'd love if you would give feedback on my prompt 1REVISED and my Ideas for prompt 2
kavinsky 1 / 3  
Nov 29, 2011   #3
The impact that the rabbit named Whiskers left on me... somewhat along the lines of how enforced your direction into being a vet because of your passion/love for animals and your willingness to devote your time to care for them.


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