Any and all feedback is extremely appreciated!
USC students are known to be involved. Briefly describe a non-academic pursuit (such as service to community or family, a club or sport, or work, etc.,) that best illustrates who you are, and why it is important you. (250 word limit)
The day I was born, my parents had high expectations for who I would become. A scientist or professor, "someone memorable," they would say. Very quickly I became in charge of my older brother who dealt with unstable emotions and I would be the head of the house when my parents would leave. It was gratifying to me, thinking that I was the better child, that I was more responsible than my brother whom was two years older than me. Now looking back, from the potential they saw in me at a young age, the actions they took were to groom me to be the best possible leader I could be.
The leadership skills I acquired by living in a dysfunctional family have pushed me to become a leader in all aspects of my life. Most importantly though, is our school's leadership club, which took a lot of guts on my part to even join. From that first meeting, my confidence began to soar, I was thriving in an environment where I was respected for my consistent commitment and attitude. The late nights I spend organizing ballots or making schedules are some of the times I feel the most valued. To be forced into a leadership role at such a young age impacted me to pursue the admiration that comes along with being a leader.
Hi Abby,
I'm pleased to read your essay. While you can explain well your experience in your family, you have great responsibility anyway. But, in my opinion, when I read your prompt, you need to choose the non-academic sector that really represent you in a real. So, it's good when you state in the beginning your idea before you explain the reasons. It will make your readers understand.
So, which one do you want to show who you are? you are in your family or school club? If you want to share both of them, you should divide in two paragraphs. It will make your essay clearly readable. With this method, you can write more focus on your each idea. Finally, sometimes you need yo make an example to explain what value that you get and help you to experience your life.
I hope it can helps. Good luck then... :)
