Prompt Discuss your favorite place to get lost (Approximately half a page or roughly 250 words)
The elderly vendor yells that her cabbage is the freshest in the market while stray puppies yelp, as they frolic around my feet. The loud pop of ppongtwigi machine (sweet puffed rice cake) reaches my ears. The warmth from the odaeng guk (fried fish cake) brewing nearby is inviting. My eyes quickly attracted toward an array of spices, each with its characteristic color and smell. My nose welcomes the confusion of pungent odors...
I have never lived in Seoul before, yet on my last visit, the local market is not foreign to me. The familiarity was reinforced as a result of my mother's countless recollections of her childhood years. As I leisurely walked down the narrow path, I relived what my mother always did on her walk home from school. The frenetic activity entertained me, unlike the monotony of an American supermarket. In Seoul, the prices were negotiable through argument and appeal while in the D.C. Metropolitan suburbs, ink on paper dictated the prices. Everything in market was out in the open, what seems to be in disarray, leaving opportunities for creativity while in America, everything was in shelves or behind doors, setting a boundary for imagination. Yet amidst all the chaos, the local market was composed of a subtle structure. Vendors had their predetermined locations and within the confined space provided, they arranged their products in a sophisticated manner to attract customers. From a broader perspective, I cannot be truly lost in the market if I followed a straight path, which eventually leads to the outskirts of the market. Although this aspect contradicted the purpose of being lost, whenever I had my full share of market's activity, I can step back and see the market as a whole, as a living organism.
Note:
This is a very rough draft and I intend on revising it several times before submission.
I greatly appreciate any criticism or praise, although I would prefer the former.
Please help me and in return, I would be glad to help you with your essays.
My suggestions:
"My eyes quickly attracted toward"--my eyes were quickly attracted toward
"I have never lived in Seoul before, yet on my last visit, the local market is not foreign to me."-- I have never lived in Seoul before, yet I am still familiar with the local market.
Have someone check this essay, as there are a lot of mistakes. Also, what specifically do you like about the market? Why is it a special place for you? Make sure your essay answers these questions.
Maybe you should describe that place with more enthusiasm.
Or explain more, why you like this place.
Would be glad if you could tell me your opinion on my revised movie essay,
