Much better. The ending was more pow. Maybe you could elaborate more, it feels like its missing something still. (not sure of what it is though)
Just a few suggestions:
In a sense,
I believe the oddness of this word is what makes it my favorite.
Like the word pulchritude, I am not what I seem to beLike the word pulchritude, there is more to me than meets me eye.
(I know sort of cliche, but...)
With my baby face and short stature, from a single glance one would assume I am reserved, quiet, and cautious by nature.At first glance, my baby face and short stature belies(or 'gives the impression') that I am reserved, quiet and cautious by nature.
But on the contrary , when one looks deeper they soon discover that I love to talk, laugh, and meet new people.
This is the part that I have a problem with. but and on the contrary seems to me to be redundant.On the contrary, I love to talk, laugh and meet new people.
While my personality is not anticipated and may come as a surprise, it contributes to the pulchritude of my individuality
not anticipated and come as a surprise is basically saying the same thing.While my personality may come as a pleasant surprise when one firsts takes in my appearance, it contributes divinely to the pulchritude of my individuality.
Hope this helps!