Beyond rankings, location, and athletics, why are you interested in attending Georgia Tech?
I'm writing my collage entrance essay for GT. Since I'm a Chinese students, there are might be some grammer mistakes in my essay. And I'm not sure if my essay is bind the topic of the question.
I enjoy the inventiveness in GT
I was familiar with computers since my mom worked in a computer center. In the beginning, the interesting games strongly attracted me. However, as I moved to junior high, I wasn't merely content to play games. The words "software", "program" came to my mind the first time. I dreamt to design my own software. I knew have to be an engineer. My cousin who studied in UA had introduced the GT to me three years ago. After researching tons of information, I found myself keenly interested in GT. The campus is full of technical atmosphere. Most people here love engineering. I've seen the students' amazing design projects at expos. Their inventiveness and practice ability shocked me. Those works are not only coming by hardworking, but also the education in GT. The study in GT is taxing. Believe it or not, I can enjoy it. Pressure can always release my potential.
I think you should delete "Believe it or not," For me, it sounds callous as if you are saying "I don't care what you think about me."
Chen, the statement that you developed does not even begin to respond to the prompt. None of the sections in it clearly discuss why you are interested in attending Georgia Tech. The first half verges on the side of a personal statement. The next half, shows a half researched, mostly just rushed and disinterested essay that supposedly explains why you want to attend the university. If you want to see an example of what a weak response to the prompt essay is, then you have successfully created one. Delete this essay. Do not use it. Instead, create a new essay. One that shows a familiarity with the university extra curricular activities. That is one of the best and simplest way to respond to the prompt. Discuss a particular organization or club that exists at the university that you hope to become a member of because of your interest in a specific college major. That should work to help you develop the foundation of your response to the essay in a more prompt aligned manner.
Vijaychen I think for the essay you must develop an image of what you like at G.T as Holt said, and think about showing them that you are fit for G.T too.
Thank you so much for your advice! How about now?
Computer games always take people's fancy. Notwithstanding I wasn't merely content to play games. How people design computer games is beyond me. GT arrested my attention that time by a club called Video Game Development. Students develop games themselves. I've been their website to play some of the games they produced, there are a plenty of different games even include the 3D. I tried to play some of them with different phones since some games support iOS, but some only support Windows or Android. The game named INDIGO gives me the most impressed. Its style similar to Super Mario, gorgeous screen, running smooth. Who can imagine it comes from some undergraduate students? Although these games are not working perfectly, the students' inventiveness and practice ability amazed me. Except their hardworking, the education in GT is essential. I'm eager to be one of them, wish I can have the chance.
Excellent work Chen. This is an essay that is definitely worthy of submitting to the university. It shows a clear reason for your desire to enroll at Georgia Tech. The fact that you were drawn to the university because of the special projects that their students did will tell the reviewer that you will be an asset to their computer community as a student. You are already familiar with their special projects and have allowed yourself to ambition for a future wherein you are going to be a member of an exclusive circle of computer programmers. While the grammar is not perfect, it gets your sentiment across to the reader. The excitement is real and, even with some grammar misfires, I would have to say that this essay works very well in delivering your voice in terms of your interest in the university.
Hi, I agree it is a big improvement from your first essay. In an essay this short, I think it is best to go into one specific topic in depth like you have done, rather than try to fit in too much. Here are a few specific suggestions:
I've been [to] their website ... different games even includ[ing ones in] 3D.
... named INDIGO [impressed me most]. Its style [is] similar to
... amazed me. [Along with determination, their education at] GT is essential. I'm eager to be one of them, [hopefully] I can have the chance.
Thank u so much!!!