What in particular about Yale has influenced your decision to apply? Please limit your response to the space provided.
I can't think of a better place than Yale to further my passion in cultural studies. I'm particularly drawn to its dynamic student life and diverse cultural groups. While pursuing a major in Ethnicity, Race and Migration, I'd love to write for Revelasians, the magazine published by the Asian American Cultural Centre, and contribute to the Intercultural Affairs Council. I wish to emerge from Yale an engaged, global citizen actively working to better the lives of others, one small step at a time.
I think that Yale can be replaced with different colleges in this writing.
I think you should have an anecdote to reveal about yourself and how it fits the community of Yale.
have you done anything similar to what Yale already provides? That you would like to further your experience in? if you can think of something...write about that a bit...hope that helps!
Thanks for the suggestions guys! I realize that this is kind of vague and doesn't really highlight anything special that attracts me to Yale.
I will revise ASAP and post another version :)
You are right Jing!....You should mention about any multi-cultural experiences you have had in your life. Also you should mention your curiosity about knowing how different people react to a certain stimulus....just elaborate a bit and the essay is gonna rock!
This is good, but it needs to answer "why" a little bit better. All of the things you mention, another school can provide. Give Yale a better idea of why you picked THEM and not any other school.
Good Luck. I'm answering the same question right now. =]
Just be forthright. "It's Yale, one of the best brand names in the world. That alone is enough reason."
its great you mentioned what you intend to do with Yale resources! besides that it is vague any college can do that for almost anyone