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"Yes, master." - Stanford Short Essay (intellectual vitality)

heartmilktea 1 / -  
Jan 2, 2009   #1
Comments on grammatical errors or anything that could improve any of these short essays are appreciated! Thank you =]

Btw there is a 1800 character limit...

Stanford students are widely known to possess a sense of intellectual vitality. Tell us about an idea or an experience you have had that you find intellectually engaging. [..]
alicimoo 3 / 24  
Jan 2, 2009   #2
...wasn't Stanford's app already due? January 1, 11:59pm EST?
Linnus 6 / 89  
Jan 2, 2009   #3
It is PST, because I still have about 50 minutes to submit it =)
hopefull 2 / 4  
Jan 2, 2009   #4
I like watching people; don't run away from me now. I simply find people's expressions fascinating; (use a :) the mysterious world of upturned mouths, bulging eye, and flushed cheeks, (use a .) Each contortion or change categorizes a different emotion. That's what intrigued me to start my own sociology experiments.

I remember my little brother's cautious glare as I smiled innocently following his every demand with a "Yes, master." I remember greeting strangers at a park with a loud "Hi" and watching old men (to watch, in return, old men) smile in astonishment or little kids run in terror following the rule "Don't talk to strangers!" However, I have graduated from all this mischief.

Volunteering in TCU at SCVMC, I began to think differently in terms of (about) sociology experiments. When a patient squirmed in pain from the uncomfortable process of detaching the TLSO brace, the nurse continued to reassure the patient that the pain would end soon. I wondered: if patients were told about the kind of pain they would (were to) expect and how to combat that (the) pain, would that result in a smoother process? When a patient was trying to pull out the ET tube from his nose, the nurse hurried to the rescue telling the patient he must not do that . (prohibiting the patient's action) A warm, caring aura filled the air and (as) I thought: do social interactions with nurses/doctors or patients (between the nurses/doctors and patients) aid in recovery or help soothe pain? If doctors looked at (overlooked) a patient's anxiety before doing a surgery, for example, would the outcome be different? Unfortunately, I cannot conduct these sociology experiments in the hospital due to my limitations as a volunteer, but these ideas continue to swim in my head. (due to my limitations as a volunteer, I was not able to conduct such sociology experiments. Yet, these ideas continue to swim in my head.)

I guess once in a while though, when I feel that that rambunctious urge of mischief come back, I'll have a little fun of my own. (I am not sure about this sentence.)

I hope this helps, but overall good job :)

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