Ding, you need to practice expressing yourself properly in English. Your sentences are quite weak and do not have any ability to clearly explain your points of reason. I think I was able to deduce some reasoning from your statements so I will try to restate your essay below in a more coherent manner. I hope that it will help you understand and learn how to properly develop your sentences and paragraphs in the future. I am almost sure that this is for the TOEFL practice test so you have time to practice and get to that level of coherence and expression in the English language :-)
It's acknowledged that a successor needs knowledge,good interpersonal relation and financial support at least.Having these conditions more easily,people nowadays are more likely to succeed than their generations.
- It is common knowledge that the factors needed to succeed these days include knowledge, good interpersonal relationships, and financial support. These conditions were hard to come by in previous generations but seem to be in over supply for the new generation of young people.Firstly,knowledge isn't expensive and can be acquired easily.For one thing,wide higher educations provide the young more access to knowledge.For the other thing,accompanied by the newest carrier to it,modern people can acquire knowledge with a single slip of button.Secondly,the young can keep good interpersonal relations conveniently.Having more instantaneous communication methods such as Internet and cell phone,working partners and friends around the globe are united tightly in fact,who can solve problems and exchange their ideas at different problems.Last important is,the young gain financial independence easily.For one thing,the colleges can provide various scholarships which would be a solid foundation for the students to make the best use of their time.For the other thing ,the possibilities of granting a loan is increasing dramatically,giving rise to the preparation of success.
- Education is more easily acquired these days due to the abundance of scholarships and student loans. A college education is no longer limited to the people from families that can afford to send their children to school. Even those who do not have the money to acquire a formal education can achieve a sense of education through some simple keystrokes in Google, thus providing some free education to those who don't have the money but wish to gain information about topics of interest to them. That is why these days, a formal education is not necessarily required in order to get ahead in the business world or career-wise.Although the young have much more challenges,they should believe that it's easier for them to success.They don't have to be afraid of fierce competitions and face of challenges bravely.
- While more challenges face the new generation of young people, it is still easier for them to achieve success compared to the previous generations because of the programs in place meant to help them succeed in life.