Please help me with my English language, like grammar, selection of words, sentence structure, etc.
THANKS A LOT!!!:)
What do you miss most from your childhood?
I read a picture-story book called "Zhi" (paper in Chinese) when I was 7, which introduced how the ancient Chinese Cai Lun invented the paper. A question popped up in my mind: Is the papermaking process according to the book really feasible? (which was a bit unbelievable to me at that time.) Then I collected materials, put the paper pulp into a small glass bottle and carried it with me wherever I went. The little piece of gray crude paper now lying between the pages of my notebook told me the answer.
I was regarded as a child with whimsical ideas, which include but not limited to writing "observational reports" of my pet parrots, teaching the neighbors' kids by imitating the way the real teachers did when I was in the First Grade, and playing the roles in my imaginary legend by my hands. Now the wacky little girl living in my head comes out now and then, but I sometimes miss the time when she overwhelmed.
heres my edit below, I made some changes:
When I was seven, I read a picture-story book called "Zhi" (paper in Chinese), which introduced me to how the ancient Chinese Cai Lun invented paper. While reading this book as a child, a question popped up in my mind; according the book, is the papermaking process described feasible? I began to collect materials. I would put the paper pulp into a small glass bottle and carry it with me wherever I went. The little piece of gray crude paper now lying between the pages of my notebook gave me an answer.
I was always regarded as a child with whimsical ideas, which included, but were not limited to, writing "observational reports" of my pet parrots, teaching the neighbors' kids by imitating the way the real teachers taught when I was in first grade, and playing the roles in my imaginary legend by my hands. Now the wacky little girl living in my head comes out now and then, but I sometimes miss the time when she overwhelmed.
Notes:
-This is a very different essay, i like it
-you need a transition from paragraph 1 to paragraph 2
-"playing the roles in my imaginary legend by my hands" Im not sure what this means, rephrase this
-"Now the wacky little girl living in my head comes out now and then, but I sometimes miss the time when she overwhelmed." this sentence does not follow the previous sentence and sounds like you were crazy haha
-I would ass more of a conclusion and maybe add how doing those things as a child made you who you are today
-talk about who you are today because of your childhood?
