|Home / Writing Feedback [23,741] - page 375 of 396|
|I believe that police protection and good schools are the main factors to create an ideal community
19 - You're doing everything right. Just keep at it and you will see improvement. I am already seeing improvement in...
Writing Feedbackorlando - Jul 12, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 16, 2009
|Identify what are the most important features of an ideal community and why they are important?
10 - Noticed this in your other essay too -- be careful with your conjugation of perfect tenses: "Good school,...
Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jul 11, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 14, 2009
|Should parents be held responsible for acts of vandalism committed by their children?
17 - Hmmmm . . . well, let's take a break from focusing on content for awhile, and start worrying about...
Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jul 8, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 14, 2009
|Tools to attract people to work.
Writing Feedbackahmad - Jul 13, 2009 / ahmad - Jul 14, 2009
|[TOEFL] Big company vs Small company
6 - Proofreading carefully is the key. It's so easy to use "site" when you mean "cite" or "wright" when you...
Writing Feedbackjohn6503 - Jul 13, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 14, 2009
|Any suggestions on this "tent" descriptive essay?
5 - Overall this is really quite interesting. Try not to get carried away, though. Sometimes, your imagery becomes a bit...
Writing Feedbackdancer09 - Jul 13, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 14, 2009
|IELTS; GENDER EQUALITY @ UNI ADMISSION
Writing Feedbackltandi - Jun 30, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 14, 2009
|TOEFL : young people should have the ability to plan and organize.
6 - You forgot to capitilize first letter of the sententences and I think your overall argumetns. Also you generalized your...
Writing Feedbackviolet0222 - Jul 9, 2009 / john6503 - Jul 13, 2009
|increase minimum wage
3 - Minimum wage laws are established in Canada and each province has its own minimum wage law. This...
Writing Feedbackpurplee - Jul 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 12, 2009
|[TOEFL] The number of cars will increase in the future
6 - In fact, the conclusion could do with some serious cutting: Before: "In conclusion, I strongly believe that there...
Writing Feedbackjohn6503 - Jul 8, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 12, 2009
|IELTS; SHARE WEALTH AMONG POORER NATIONS
12 - Some comments on first part There always exist both rich and poor people in one community. Some poor people...
Writing FeedbackEve - Jul 2, 2009 / tiantian12 - Jul 12, 2009
|Too much rules are useful or not?
Writing Feedbackahmad - Jul 6, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 11, 2009
|Is Obama's stimulus package working?
15 - Noto, I think you will be an excellent history teacher, if that's the field you elect to pursue. The...
Writing Feedbackjohn6503 - Jul 9, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 11, 2009
|GMAT issue essay - censorship of television programmes
9 - Actually, if you believe that censorship of television is necessary to protect children, then that argument would presumably be...
Writing Feedbackrashminet84 - Jul 8, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|'minimum obligations' [TOEFL] Who enjoyed/enjoy life better? Older or Young?
6 - Your structure and content are good, here. You have the right general formula down, and use some strong concrete...
Writing Feedbackjohn6503 - Jul 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|IELTS: International Tourism - TENSION or UNDERSTANDING?
11 - And when brainstorming, write down both the pro and the con arguments that occur to you. You may find...
Writing Feedbackorlando - Jul 8, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|CBEST: the most important trait a teacher can have is self-acceptance!
9 - Here, we have a very common logical error. The question states that self-acceptance helps teachers to relate better to...
Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jul 6, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 10, 2009
|[TOEFL] Serious movies or entertaining movies? Which is better?
9 - You were taught it? I never was, in school or at university. I first learned about it through my...
Writing Feedbackjohn6503 - Jul 9, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|Nowadays people care more about their appearance more than before. Do you agree?
11 - Certainly. I think we can agree that people responding to the prompt are free to write about whatever time...
Writing Feedbacktieuzidane - Jul 8, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|"The Attitude of Success!" - CBEST: successful person essay!
14 - No, no . . . the conversation was meant to highlight the weakness of your description, not as suggested...
Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jul 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|Should university studies be subsidized?
9 - Specific details are usually a good idea. In this particular essay, though, the statistics for Sri Lanka really need...
Writing FeedbackIELTS_Student - Jul 1, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|Ielts : working children; Good or bad?
6 - You could learn a lot by studying trangquynh's essay. He has the right formula. Three specific reasons, each treated...
Writing Feedbackorlando - Jul 9, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 10, 2009
|The eating habits and lifestyle of children in different countries/generations.
10 - Thank you for your comment tranqquynh. You are right that I didnt plan my essay well. I think of...
Writing Feedbackorlando - Jul 7, 2009 / orlando - Jul 9, 2009
|Corporate Case Study, XXX-Car
Writing Feedbackbretta49 - Jul 6, 2009 / bretta49 - Jul 9, 2009
|1st essay in 13 years. Disadvantages that working mothers give to their children
Writing Feedbackdhachem - Jun 25, 2009 / Notoman - Jul 9, 2009
|"poor countries in the world" - wealthy nations to be required to share their wealth?
12 - Your grammar needs work in order to improve to the level of an academic essay. Use online tests and...
Writing Feedbackorlando - Jul 7, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 8, 2009
|Media in the Courtroom
3 - Yeah, once you have the essay down to about a third of its original length, you should have a...
Writing Feedbackdgoldsby - Jul 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 8, 2009
|Ielts essay. Working women and children
Writing Feedbackorlando - Jul 8, 2009 / orlando - Jul 8, 2009
|IELTS essay: Museums as a form of entertainment or education?
Writing Feedbacktrangquynh - Jul 6, 2009 / trangquynh - Jul 7, 2009
|Tv's influences on culture... who can help me to correct this essay?
9 - Ahmad, I would like to see your corrections of this essay. Can you add your last draft? Thanks!...
Writing Feedbackahmad - Jul 4, 2009 / bubuvio - Jul 7, 2009
|Prescribed drugs and its various effects on the body and mind
Writing Feedbackfernaj13 - Jul 1, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 7, 2009
|Leaders in my life (16 years so far)
Writing Feedbackcbuddy - Jul 5, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 6, 2009
|There are many places that wait their visitors; Turkish Tourism Culture
4 - At the moment, you have so few details that you could turn this into a single paragraph, and, once...
Writing Feedbackosman - Jul 2, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
|GRE analytical writing ..TOPIC (preservation on endangered species)
7 - It's not so much that you need to justify this statement, per se. You should of course rewrite...
Writing FeedbackNEHALB - Jul 4, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
|Changed in Everyday Life Caused by New Technology
4 - Okay, I know you writing this essay to practice grammar, but still, why are you writing this essay? All...
Writing Feedbackmajed - Jul 1, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
|"People of MTV generation have no patience. They want instant satisfaction." 2 3
84 - The notion of a dull terror inspiring frenzy is sort of neat, if a bit paradoxical. Or perhaps it...
Writing Feedbackshe_kitty - May 16, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
|How can I play into the hands of my Maker - Sunday Morning 2
51 - Yes, you have great potential as a writer, and should definitely keep on recording your thoughts. Starting new reflections...
Writing FeedbackRajiv - Jun 7, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
|Single career or several careers? Both have negatives and positives
4 - You seem to be arguing that having a single career is easier than having multiple ones. However, Simone is...
Writing FeedbackEve - Jul 1, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jul 4, 2009
|An Essay about " my ideal vacation". someone proof read it!
5 - People tend to be wordy and include useless phrases when (a) they've not thought closely enough about what...
Writing FeedbackBananaPancakes - Jul 3, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 4, 2009
|Paper about an important movie
Writing Feedbackkim1 - Jun 30, 2009 / kim1 - Jul 1, 2009
|Comparing Brutus's and Mark Antony's rhetoric in Julius Caesar
3 - I also notice that you seem to be arguing that Mark Antony has the better rhetoric because the crowd...
Writing Feedbackkleinhenz - Jun 30, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jul 1, 2009
|"Cellular Phones" - need someone proof read my paper
Writing FeedbackSoCkMoNkeYJaNe - Jun 29, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 30, 2009
|No Driving Licenses for People Under 18 - Argumentation/ Persuasion Essay
Writing Feedbacknewuser1 - Jun 29, 2009 / Mustafa1991 - Jun 30, 2009
|GRE analytical writing ..TOPIC (the need for global universities.)
4 - You might also want to explain in a bit more detail what a "global university" would look like. If...
Writing FeedbackNEHALB - Jun 29, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 30, 2009
|"Going overseas for the university" essay
7 - Why thank you. I'm afraid it doesn't bode well for the essay, though. When your reader's first thought is...
Writing Feedbackzeny - Jun 27, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 30, 2009
|Libraries are not just a collection of books: Are public libraries important?
4 - People still do this? I thought going off-line would result in a horrible death by some form of...
Writing Feedbackiris1 - Jun 27, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 27, 2009
|IELTS essay: Newspapers will soon become a thing of the past
7 - For this sort of essay, a completely one-sided argument is generally okay, and easier to write. In general, though,...
Writing Feedbacktrangquynh - Jun 26, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 26, 2009
|Your decision to enter the education field - CBEST Essay pratice
10 - I'm not so sure: Mark Twain wrote several humorous essays in the first person voice of a wrong-headed narrator....
Writing Feedbackrolandj727 - Jun 23, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 25, 2009
|"tip the waiter" essay - what have you learnt from a mistake?
9 - Should we tip the waiter?". "Okay.", he said. Outside the restaurant, we (me and my 4 friends) were...
Writing Feedbackchintan - Jun 21, 2009 / Liebe - Jun 25, 2009
|CBEST: Technology today has been positive or negative impact?
16 - Actually, I think you have done a very good job of showing that the creation of the atomic bomb...
Writing Feedbackbubuvio - Jun 10, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 24, 2009
|Essay about: what would you change of your former high school?
14 - Whenever I hear the word school, I immediately visualize phrases like exams, presentations, essays, textbooks, or dictations, rather than...
Writing Feedbackivan9210 - Jun 6, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 24, 2009
|Essay on the Types of Germs - bacteria
22 - I like the quotation you used. Perhaps you should cite it, according to whatever format you are supposed to...
Writing FeedbackHaya - Jun 4, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 19, 2009
|TOEFL - modern society has become more complex, so it is essential for the young people
Writing Feedbacklibo_for - Jun 10, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 19, 2009
|TOEFL Writing: 2 short essays (reading versus doing things; Neighbors)
Writing Feedbackbon - Jun 15, 2009 / biggestv - Jun 18, 2009
|a baby doesn't know the intricacy of external world; TOEFL IBT Essay "Parents are the best teachers"
6 - Content-wise you could shore up your essay by defining what exactly you mean by "best teacher" before attempting to...
Writing FeedbackHVC - Jun 16, 2009 / EF_Sean - Jun 17, 2009
|Narrative essay- important decision for CBEST Pormpt
2 - First I will talk about content and then about grammar and style. You've made a good choice concerning which...
Writing Feedbacksapst21 - Jun 16, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 17, 2009
|CBEST Essay using technology prompt
8 - The handbook I am using is the one created and required by a major U.S. university. Again, Sean, your...
Writing Feedbackrolandj727 - Jun 15, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 16, 2009
|TOEFL Essay on why people want to study (give me any comment on my following essay)
Writing Feedbacklinjuncai - Jun 14, 2009 / linjuncai - Jun 16, 2009
|Cultural psychology short paper
Writing Feedbackcarlychan - Jun 13, 2009 / EF_Simone - Jun 16, 2009
|The Advantages of Capital Punishment-- very short essay --
6 - thank you.......
Writing Feedbacksilentheart - Jun 12, 2009 / silentheart - Jun 16, 2009
|Home / Writing Feedback|