Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2


IELTS Essay- Advances in science and technology


marzieh307 4 / -  
Jan 14, 2013   #1
Advances in science and technology and other areas of society in the last 100 years have transformed the way we live as well as postponing the day we die. There is no better time to be alive than now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Today, technology became a part of our life. Advance in technology is incredible. Everything has been changing during the past century for example way that we live, our foods, our hobbies. There is a big point here that must be attention , every change is not good at all.

Thanks to technology, our life today become easier more than the past. We have a lot of electronic device in our home that these machines do everything for us. In the past, people had trouble in communication, but today this problem has solved by internet. In additional, the most important advance of technology or science appear in medicine. we had a lot of disease in the past that there is no cure for them such as Cholera, Pestilence, Tuberculosis, but now we can cure them.

However, with all advantage of technology, there is some dark side. We do our work easier, we do not worry about disease, we have new energy source like nuclear energy, nonetheless we lost our humanity. Nowadays, everything has a value, so we can buy it. Although we live together, we do not know about each outer. We prefer call to somebody or send e-mail to theme instead of go visiting. In small family everybody has a laptop or smart phone, so they spend more time on work with their electronic devices than speak with other.

In conclusion, although I like and enjoy of technology and grateful to science, sometimes I miss for simple and kind people that lived in the past.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
Jan 14, 2013   #2
Today, technology became a part of our life.

Today, technology has become a part of our life making us more and more dependent on it.

Advance in technology is incredible.

.... this sounds repetitive. You are repeating the same idea again and it is not good for your essay. I wish if you left this out.

Everything has been changing during the past century for example way that we live, our foods, our hobbies

Everything has been changing during the past century such as our lifestyles, foods, hobbies etc.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay- Advances in science and technology
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳