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Advertisements have appeared ubiquitously in today's daily life


Le Thuy Vy 1 / 2 1  
May 17, 2020   #1

Essay about advertisements



Adverstisements are becoming more and more common in our daily life. It is a positive or negative development ? (Please score my essay, thanks in advance)

Commercials are considered as one of the core factors in every company's marketing strategies. As a result, advertisements have appeared ubiquitously in daily life. From my perspective, this phenomenon has undeniable perks as well as negative influences. Thus, i will support my opinion for the reasons discussed further below.

On the one hand, the field of advertising has provided stable jobs and part-time jobs for a lot of people. Not only senior artists or experienced graphic designers can pursue this career but undergraduate students with aptitude for art and imagination can design logos, labels for financial demands. Additionally, by means of advertiaements, customers are kept informed about newly launched products. Therefore, they will have more choices which will latter enhance their comfort and living standards. In return, companies will have a chance to approach potential customer and plan for proper sales campaigns.

On the other hand, promotions often enticed people into purchasing items that they do not really need. By using special effects, the external appearance and quality of the products will be exaggerated considerably that will resulted in the frustration and disappointment of consumers due to the unwanted products. Furthermore, the large scale expansion of advertisements in every social media platforms can threaten one's own private information. By accidentally clicking in some online commercials, one's profile such as ID address or E-mail password can be stolen for illicite purposes.

All things considered, the growing trend of advertisements can be regarded as a positive process for the job opportunities and a win-win for both consumers and firms. However, this trend have adverse impact for unpleasant shopping expericences and security deficiencies.

pha 2 / 3 1  
May 17, 2020   #2
beside explaining the reason, you should also add some examples for your opinion if u want to boost your score.
Holt [Contributor] - / 8,568 2485  
May 18, 2020   #3
You are scored mainly, on your ability to analyze and respond to the given question, without changing the discussion instructions. Unfortunately, you changed the discussion instructions in your essay, which will give you a starting score / base score of 3 The score is based on how you failed to present a clear position given the discussion instructions. This resulted in an improperly discussed essay response presentation.

Discussion Instruction: It is a positive or negative development ?
Your Response: this phenomenon has undeniable perks as well as negative influences


You opted to discuss both points of view, turning the essay into a A/D discussion rather than the required single opinion essay. The single opinion is represented by the word "or" in the discussion instruction. "Or" signifies that you have to make a choice regarding 2 different decisions. In this case, either you believe that this a positive development or, you believe that it has negative results. The discussion response should have indicated:

I believe that this is a positive development in terms of job opportunities and consumer interest.

From there, the 2 discussion paragraphs should have discussed the positive job opportunities in individual paragraphs. One topic each.

Reasoning paragraph 1: the field of advertising has provided stable jobs and part-time jobs for a lot of people
Reasoning paragraph 2: customers are kept informed about newly launched products


No negative discussions should be presented because you are expected to give 2 convincing reasons to the examiner that should prove your opinion is the correct one. Hence, this is a single opinion essay, not an A/D essay. Only one of the 2 alternative discussion choices should be supported in your overall presentation.
OP Le Thuy Vy 1 / 2 1  
May 18, 2020   #4
@Holt
Thanks for your constructive feedback, i will rewrite it tonight


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