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Advertising - there are many advantages side of it which is changing our lives to positive side

Bob brother 15 / 22  
Dec 11, 2014   #1
Theme: Advertising is all around us: it is an unavoidable part of everyone's life. Some people say that advertising is a positive part of our lives while others say it is negative. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. you should write at least 250 words.

Nowadays, everyone can see advertisements everywhere. Some people think that is has a positive effect in our lives whereas others believe its drawbacks outweigh. from my experience, I think that advertisements have made our life more comfortable, despite few negative aspects.

First of all, advertising inform people with new products and their price, quality and the way how to find them, on TV or on radio. Even in the Internet it is possible to search for new products following side advertisements. People do not need any more for instance, shopping around a lot of markets looking for just a small thing with wasting many hours. Secondly, many businessmen can earn big amount of money, because nowadays marketing based on advertisement. If there is no any advertising, the world economy wouldn't rise as fast as now. Finally, advertising companies may give job opportunities for unemployment society who are sitting at home and doing nothing.

On the other hand, sometimes advertisements motivate people for some products which they do not need especially women. They will run to purchase these advertised products such as cosmetics, clothes, jewelries and so forth. Therefore, alcoholic product advertisements stimulate young generation to drink or eat them which are causing teenager addictions. Lastly, some people buy good advertised medical products without doctor's permission which have a lot of side effects to human body.

In conclusion, despite some drawbacks of advertising, there are many advantages side of it which is changing our lives to positive side. I personally believe that advertisement has farther outweighed benefits than its negatives.

(Words 260)
vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Dec 13, 2014   #2
Raimov, you are one paragraph short in this essay. The positive and negative paragraph discussions of the essay are based upon the common perceptions regarding the effects of advertising. Both of your discussions offer plausible and acceptable reasons on behalf of the side the discussion is supporting. Your personal opinion should have been the third paragraph in the essay. A lengthy discussion of your personal opinion is actually the main aim of this type of essay. You were required to present a first person opinion on the matter before finalizing the essay with a summary conclusion that included the shortened form of the positive and negative effects, a reiteration of your personal opinion, and a closing statement. A conclusion cannot contain a new idea. With such a type of essay discussion, should should easily make 300 - 500 words which is the standard length of a well developed essay.
vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Dec 21, 2014   #3
There are grammatical errors that can be corrected within the essay. However, it has always been my policy to first have the student revise the essay using the instructions provided for the revision in order to limit the number of revision movements in the essay. Once an essay is revised, the overall content is affected and therefore, needs to be re-edited. That is why I always ask the student to revise the essay first and then I work with the student on revising the grammar content and tightening the essay. I will be more than happy to do the same with you once you have provided the revision I recommended you do in the essay :-)

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