Research has shown that overeating is as harmful as smoking. Therefore, the advertising of certain food products should be banned in the same way as the advertising of cigarettes is banned. Do you agree or disagree?.
Food have played a essential role in the mankind for thousand years. In the 21st century,some people believe that some kind of food should be limited as the limitation of cigarettes and tobaccos they did before,due to the negative impact to the community. In my private opinion, I completely agree with this view.
Firstly, the food, which have high cholesterol and unnatural chemicals, such as fast food and junk food, are damaging seriously to the human 's health. There are over 1000 of patients, who have problem with obesity, have been added in the world every year and this signal will increse more quickly in next several years, following a research of WHO in 2014. The most crucial reason is they have abused KFC or MC Donald for a long time, instead of using more healthy products. That thing explain why we should control and carry out advertisements of some certain products.
Secondly, If the congress create laws to limit the society using too much the unhealthy food, it will make a big change in the human 's behavior in eating by using more traditional product with high nutritional value. In fact, in Canada, 80% of junk food companies are taxed with the same level of tobacco by the government and they are not allowed to advertise in any means of communications. As a result, the activities in producing and using some kind of unhealthy food will be controlled.
In conclusion, because of the disadvantage of some certain food product, particularly junk food, It should be limited in the public with the most powerful solutions.
can somebody tell me how score did i get in 4 criteria of IELTS and which is the biggest false to make my score go down seriously :
-coherence and cohesion
-grammartical range and accuracy
Thank you ^^