Prohibition of smoking in public
In recent years, many governments have brought in laws to ban smoking in public places, such as bars, restaurants and offices
To what extend do you agree or disagree with banning smoking in public places?
It is claim that many governments have created some laws against smoking in crowded areas like bars, restaurants, offices, etc. This essay is totally agree with this action because not only smoking harms the environment, people who are nearby but also may cause some fires.
Truthfully, smoking is one of the biggest enemies to our health, specifically our breathing system. Cigarette contains an addictive substance called nicotine which you may have bad breath, inferior breathing system and even cancer. From what I have learnt, these symptoms not only affecting those smoking directly but also have bad influence to people standing nearby breathing the smoke released by cigarette. Therefore, smoking in public places will place a severe sickness to many people. For example, there are few cases in Vietnam reported for having an inferior lung or problems to breathe due to the nicotine or smoke even though they have not consumed any cigarette.
Moreover, cigarette's ashes are sometimes considered to be a sort of causes of fire in many place. Starkly, fire from the cigarette doesn't effaced away immediately when they throw it away. Ergo, if there are some flammable materials passes by, a big fire emerges without alerting. For instance, the world has been involved in lightened jungles caused by cigarette's ashes which led to some remarkable consequences.
Finally, the nicotine in the cigarette is regarded to be the most direct stimulant that leads to many deaths. It is understandable that people who smoke consume the nicotine and many other bad ingredients straightly to their lungs. As a consequence, it causes many illness which can be enumerated as lung cancer and other deadly symptoms. Realistically, roughly most of the patient who have breath's problems are usually affected by smoking. Furthermore, lung cancer is the solemn sickness with no cure leading to many deaths not only in Vietnam but also the world acknowledged by sheer amount of both intellectual and non-intellectual human. So banning it in the public places will somehow restrain smoker's thirsts and may help them abandon it coincidently.
To conclude, smoking is extremely harmful and deadly to whom who smoke or just stand nearby breathing under the same air. So that, I assume smoking should be banned and we need do propagandize more about its harm and disadvantages.@QuocHuu
Hi Quoc Huu! This is my comment for your presentation.
1. Because the title maybe related to the ilets writing task 2, thus, your presentation is too long more than 400 words while the standards of task 2 only around 250 words
2. Some mistakes in your presentation that you should concentrate on:
- It is claimed
- bad influence to on
- a severe sickness to for many people
- cigarette's ashes (I'm not sure about this but I think possessive case only use for things and phenomena alive or when you use to personify things)
- the cigarette doesn't effaced
- many places
- we need to do propagandize
3. You use too much 'many' in one paragraph. Therefore, you should try another synonyms of that word such as lots of, various...
4. From my perspectives, I don't think you should put some words like "just, " on the essay because they are informal and not able to transfer your message strongly.
5. The structure of your essay is not good like one essay that you post on the forum. 5 paragraphs not suitable in this case, it make the essay to long, 4 paragraphs enough. You should follow the feedback of @ Holt to fix your presentation and your performance.
Best Regards!
