Do you agree or disagree? Young people nowadays do not give enough time to helping their communities.
In today's world, individuals with different cultural backgrounds and personality traits are doing various activities in different sectors of society. It is no surprise, if you find a handful of people at young age want to rush to the aid of their communities. However, generally speaking, I agree that young people prefer not spending time to help their communities.
Today cities are more congested than ever before. Young adults are overwhelmed by works and various occupations and they do not have enough time to facilitate the progress of communities. Life in city is tantamount to crowded subway system, noisy streets and intolerable traffic jams. People most of the times should run to get to their works on time. Inevitably, they would arrive at home exhausted. Even if they want to pursue their hobbies like helping a community, there is no energy left for them to engage in such activities. Most of the people in London, for instance, should get up at 6:00 AM every morning and take a taxi or drive their cars to arrive at a company which might be 60 kilometers away from their home, and this story happens again when they return home at 6:00 PM in the evening. Apparently, they want to spend the rest of the day with their families and they have no time to volunteer in assisting communities.
Furthermore, today, with the advent of technology, many duties and jobs are more specialized. It would be difficult to find someone who is not graduated in a particular major or does not obtain a special craft or profession. Communities, either religious, political, scientific or social, need to be managed by professionals and adept administrators. Therefore, what they mainly need is not the help of young people, but the help of devoted people, though middle-aged or old, who entirely spend their time and energy to develop communities. For instance, if a young 20-years-old biochemistry student who is busy with university assignments and researches on Carbon Nanotubes, wants to involve himself in a political community, would not be able to bring much help to the community. It would be more justifiable, if that political community ask for the help of an old person who has enough knowledge of politics and can serve the community by assigning enough time.
All things considered, communities are more in need of individuals who have enough time and energy and have the specialties to help the communities. In this age, due to the congestion of cities and emergence of technology, finding young individuals who are qualified to help such communities is becoming more scares and expecting all the young people to collaborate on communities' activities is not logical.
However, generally speaking, I agree that young people prefer not to spending time to helpon helping their communities.
Today cities today are more congested than ever before. Young adults are overwhelmed by works and various occupations and they do not have enough time to facilitate the progress of communities.
People most of the times shouldhave to run to get to their workson timemost of the time . Inevitably, they would arrive at home exhaustedly .
Apparently, they wantprefer to spend the rest of the day with their families and they have no time to volunteer in assisting communities.
Furthermore, today,[try to avoid this structure. don't write lots of phrases jointed by commas] with the advent of technology, many duties and jobs are more specialized.
Therefore, what they mainly need is not the help of young people, but the help of devoted people, though middle-aged or old,who may be older but willwho entirely spend most of their time and energy to developing communities.
For instance, if a young 20-years-old biochemistry student who is busy with university assignments and researches on Carbon Nanotubes, wants to involve himselfbe involoved in a political community, would not be able to bring much help to the community.
use more conjunction words instead of commas
- at a young
- age wantwho want to rush
- by works and various
- Life in the city is tantamount
- Most of the timep eople most of the times
- should run to get to their works on time.
- Inevitably, they would arrive at home exhausted.
- ...someone who ishas not graduated
- needs to be
- and have the specialtiescapacity to help
- due to the congestion ofin the cities
I believe you were able to direct what the prompt is asking, therefore, the remarks I did should be able to modify the essay and you should be able to submit it.
Also, please refrain from using direct translation on your sentences because this can affect the grammar and your entire essay as a whole, mind your linking verbs too and make sure that you use words that will be conversational enough to comprehend.
