Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4


Ielts task 2 - the aim of university education


Lucy Ngong 3 / 4  
Nov 17, 2015   #1
After high school, all most people have been tried to go to universities with a hope that it will bring them a better career in the future. While they belive intensely that ensurance of job opportunities is the only benefit, others suppose each individuals and society gain considerable benefits from attaining university education. In this essay, i will ague both side of this issue.

It cannot deny that people who have university degree have better jobs and higher living standard than others who have not. The majority people want to develop future career prospects and attending university is the best choice because it improve personal working skills and atractiveness to potential employers. In addition, university education give you a solid foundation knowledge which will help you increase specialized skills and easily learn new technical knowledge in the future. For example,I work for an advertising company as marketing researcher and thank to what i learned at banking university, i get up with new knowledge so fast.

However, there are much wider benefits of having university degree for both individuals and society must be counted subsequent. First, people who study in university have better social skills and more confident cause of living away from home. A case in point is that many students have move to hostel and meeting new friends. As a result, their maturity and confidence will grow enabling them to live more fullfilling lives. Second, social will gain from the contribution that the graduates can make to the economy. Educated labour certainly have higher efficency and create hude value for the social. Besides,we are living in a competitive world, so countries need well-informed people in order to compete and develop.

In brief, in spite of getting brilliant careers in the future is the major profit of university education, I am strongly agree that both individuals and social gain a lot benefits from this action. If we encourage the number of university attendances, we will improve the future of individuals and social.
Ra_fhli 22 / 17 8  
Nov 17, 2015   #2
Hy LUCY, Iam pleased to know you here. anyway I have some corrections regarding to your writing. Despite some miss spelling I found, also about some confuse words. It might be you just translate from your mother tongue.

The important one is you might forget to enclosure the question. Thus I Couldn't evaluate more. For the next time, I hope you can type your question since it is profoundly essential. So, we can discuss about your IDEA.

After graduate from high school, all most numerous people have been tried prefer to go to universities with a hope that it will bring them a to invest better career in the their future. Whilethey Some people beliEve intensely that e Insurance of a great job opportunities is the only benefit, WHILE others suppose CONVINCE that individuals and society gain worthwhile merits from attaining university education. In this FOLLOWING essay, i will aRgue both side of this issue.
OP Lucy Ngong 3 / 4  
Nov 18, 2015   #3
Thank to yours advises, I forgot post the question. Here is the question :
Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.
nsahmad 11 / 14 3  
Nov 18, 2015   #4
Hi ngong, happy to read your writing.
let me give some suggestions.

However, there are much wider benefits of having university degree for both individuals and society must be counted subsequenta wide number of benefits for them who have university qualification.
First, people who study in university have better social skills and more confident because of living away from home. A case in point is that many students have moved to hostel and met new friends.

Comment.
*much for noun uncountable, so no S in the last word.
*perfect tense form : have/has V3.
* "and" is parallel word, hence it should be the same form.

Hope helpful.


Home / Writing Feedback / Ielts task 2 - the aim of university education
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳