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Air transport is increasingly used to export fruit and vegetables between countries. IELTS TASK 2


Hassan91 1 / 1  
May 5, 2019   #1

food products transportation by air



Air transport is increasingly used to export fruit and vegetables to countries where they cannot be grown or are out of season.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?


There is always a discussion that air transportation has increased rapidly by using to export fruit and commodities between countries within all seasons of the years. This essay will discuss that the advantage of air transportation is narrowing the distance between nations and induce them to support each other during a tough time while the disadvantage is an increase the air pollution.

On the one hand, never before the world was connected as a small village while this happens by utilizing air transportation. The primary reason and benefit of air transportation is to help nations to assist each other during the catastrophes by aiding them with foods or medicine using efficient strategies such as air transportation. Aviation industry facilitates a lot of countries to trade their commodities or vegetables to another nation that might require in a specific time of the years. For example, According to a study by The world Trading Association in 2016, many countries said that 54% of South America vegetables are available in their markets all seasons.

On the other hand, the main drawbacks of air transportation is air pollution and lead to global warming. Aeroplane employ fossil fuel in their engines, therefore these aircraft have a negative impact in the environment by increasing greenhouse gas emissions such as carbon dioxide and monoxide in the atmosphere. For instance, a particularly good example was illustrated in 2015 by Australia Sustainable Organization, the data showed that 61% of countries who using air transportation have a high rate of air pollution compared to other didn't employ it.

In conclusion, the main advantage of air transportation is helping to export fruit and vegetables with other nations while the drawback is increased air pollution.

eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,196 459  
May 5, 2019   #2
Helloo there.., thank you for posting your essay here

Although this essay is good, some improvements are needed as to help you score this even better.

Let me start with the first paragraph. Majority of IELTS students develop their introduction by simply restating the rubric in the question and showing their claims towards the issues given. Here do I see you have successfully done. However, one to two phrases found there can be categorized as hackneyed phrases where almost they are found in students' IELTS essays. A closer look at these phrases:

There is always a discussion that

&

This essay will discuss that

. They are omnipresent, always somewhere around attached in IELTS essays. I suggest you omit them, and therefore your introduction looks more succinctly

The two topic sentences in the body paragraphs are not developed well, since you have left one keyword: export fruit and vegetables. Such keyword is supposed to be in a topic as well. If you leave it away, you fail to write a relevant topic. Fruit and vegetables transported over a long distance build stable market (topic sentence 1) & The export of fruit and vegetables leads to air pollution (topic sentence 2) I just share two topic sentences. Please peruse them more closely.

The conclusion paragraph sounds repetitive. Repetition in the conclusion sends you to score a 6.0 in Task Responses. Learn how to give a personal comment which is relevant to the topic discussion prior to ending your essay.

Hope this helps you

Best of luck for your IELTS exam

Eddy Suaib, English Studio Indonesia, IELTS Kampung Inggris Pare Kediri
OP Hassan91 1 / 1  
May 5, 2019   #3
Hi, Eddy Suaib
Thank you so much for your valuable feedback and mentioned my weak points that I need to work on. Actually, one of my main concern is the topic sentence. Now I try to improve it and exercise how to write a topic sentence and then develop it. Do you have any suggestion for that which might help me.


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