Air travel has become more prevalent by virtue of providing flexible options of price to passengers

Cheap Air Flight Essay

Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think the cheap air flight should be banned because it polluted the air and brings many other problems. Discuss both view and give your opinions.

In this era of technological advancements, air travel has become more prevalent by virtue of providing flexible options of price to passengers. While cheap air flight is thought to supply regular people with more opportunities to travel, others oppose this kind of transport because of its running the risks of contaminating the air and other troubles. From my point of view, this issue has its own pros and cons as discussed in the essay below.

On the one hand, it is undeniable that cheap airline has extraordinarily assisted the tourists to fly far more liberally and expeditiously. Air travelling had been considered as a luxury service for decades, however, it is now no longer a chimera to ordinary people. In addition, the greater number of flights and passengers enables intercultural exchanges between the foreigners themselves or between the foreigners and the natives. Therefore, visitors have the chances to gain more knowledge about different cultures or countries which used to be unfamiliar. Moreover, low-priced air flight also contributes to promoting the economy. In detail, the airlines can earn interest from providing flight services and the tourism industry of the host countries would also expand as the tourists move abroad.

On the other hand, opponents of this issue argue that economical air travel should be prohibited by dint of deteriorating air quality and causing other problems. The number of airplanes departing and landing uncontrollably increases can lead to the escalation in the usage of natural resources and the amount of carbon dioxide emitted into the atmosphere, contributing to global warming, climate change and worsening the environmental condition. Furthermore, cheap air travel also causes an indirect consequence of aggravating human respiratory system and diseases.

In conclusion, it seems to me that it is a necessity to give people the freedom to travel, however, some crucial solutions should be made as well in order to avoid the adverse effects.

I can see 2 points in your essay:
1- "However" should be you in the beginning of the sentence or in the middle of the sentence between semicolon. For example: .However,.... or ....;however,.....

2 - You should have some example to make the essay clear

Two problems with this essay:

- cut and paste of the phrase "cheap air flight"
- Changing of the discussion instruction

Once a word or phrase is used in the original prompt, the student is advised to avoid using the same phrase in the restatement to help boost his LR and GRA score. The LR score is based on your knowledge of the English language and the GRA score is based on your ability to explain the prompt in your own words or understanding. So, rather than saying cheap flights, you could have said affordable overseas travel or airplane tourism, or any variation thereof.

The original discussion instruction is:

OI: Discuss both view and give your opinions.
YI: From my point of view, this issue has its own pros and cons as discussed in the essay below.

You were being asked to discuss the following public opinions (points of view)
- cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom
- cheap air flight should be banned because it polluted the air and brings many other problems.

A compare and contrast essay was required for that part of the presentation, before your personal opinion. In your format, you made it a personal opinion discussion based only on pros and cons. That means you failed to follow the required discussion format. That error will cost you and prevent you from achieving a passing score with your essay.