Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


Animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans



joshdiamond 1 / -  
Feb 2, 2021   #1

ANIMAL EXPLOITATION - IELTS WRITING TASK 2



A growing number of people feel that animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans, while others argue that humans must employ animals to satisfy their various needs, including uses for food and research. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Essay:
People's opinions differ as to whether or not animals should be used to serve human life. Although there are some strong arguments against the employment of animals, personally I still believe that it is a necessary aspect of food production and research.

On the one hand, there are two main reasons why animal exploitation should be banned. Firstly, it is recognized that animals have consciousness as well as the capacity to experience pain, fear, and even distress just as humans do. Supporters of animal rights therefore argue that humans have no right to subject animals to the trauma of being slaughtered or tested on, as the benefits to humans do not justify the suffering caused. Secondly, many biologists would agree that exploiting animals excessively can lead to biodiversity loss and disturb the ecological balance. For example, a considerable number of marine species such as tuna are on the edge of extinction mainly as a result of overfishing, and surely this will have a dramatic influence on the marine ecosystem.

In spite of the above arguments, I believe that abolishing all forms of animal use in human life is completely impractical. Livestock not only serves as a major source of meat and other products for humans, but also provides job opportunities for those in rural areas. Eliminating the use of these animals therefore may cause unnecessary difficulties, including food shortage and a rise in unemployment. Similarly, medicines and other products are routinely tested on animals to measure their effectiveness and make sure that they are cleared for human use. If animal experimentation is banned, I suspect that new, unproven drugs might be instead even directly tested on humans, and this is simply unacceptable from an ethical perspective.

In conclusion, it seems to me that it would be wrong, on balance, for humanity to stop using animals for our own purposes. (309 words)

P/s: To be honest, I have read some threads in this website in which the Holt advised students to use the 5-paragraph format for the discussion essay. However, a quite well-known IELTS teacher who is an ex-examiner has said that it is unnecessary and I just need to mention my opinion in the third paragraph, along with the introduction and conclusion. I am quite confused about that!!!
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 16060  
Feb 2, 2021   #2
Different teachers have different writing styles that they teach their students. I teach differently from the person you consulted. My way works for the students here, who do not consult with other IELTS examiners / tutors. They learn my way, they pass using my way, with the highest possible scores based on my writing method. Since you already have a tutor for your IELTS test, you should learn only his way of writing. Do not confuse yourself by trying to learn 2 different writing styles. Only your score and your writing skills will suffer. Now, knowing that you already have a tutor on hand, I cannot give you advise regarding your current essay. The last thing I want to do is confuse you and make you second guess how you should write your essay. Follow your teacher. I am not going to come in while you are learning how to handle these tests, give you different advise, and leave you confused. Follow the teacher whom you think will give you the better score. In this case, you have already learned from someone else, do not go looking to change your writing formula at this point. It would be detrimental to your learning process.


Home / Writing Feedback / Animals should not be exploited by people and that they should have the same rights as humans
ⓘ Need academic writing help? 100% custom and human!
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳