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Animals should have protection rights instead of having the same rights as humans

teddytran95 1 / -  
Nov 22, 2018   #1


Nowadays, animals play an important role in the human society. Some people believe that animals should be treated like humans, the others think that animals are only used for researches or benefits. This essay will discuss both views and give some opinions.

On one hand, animals should be treated fairly because they like people in many ways. In other words, animals have emotions, they are intelligent and they know how to care and bring up their child. Thus, animals deserve to be treated as well as humans. For example, monkeys are extremely smart, dogs are the most loyal animals. In addition, humans depend on animals for survive, instead of proving food, they help people in many cases such as detections, cures, buildings, etc.

On the other hand, people should not give rights for all of animals. Firstly, the biggest difference between humans and animals is animals act instinctively, they can harm to people. Secondly, rights go with obligations, people have rights but they also have to contribute society and make a rich society. While animals can not do anything like this, proving food and research are their missions. Thus, people should care and love them instead of giving them the same rights as humans.

In my opinion, although animals can not have the same rights as human but animals should have some rights such as protection and risk of extinction. Because of a number of animals are on the verge of extinction such as mountain gorillas, South China tiger, etc. Besides, people use animals for research in order to decrease risks and cost. Thus, research on animals is permissible and people should not use animals unconsciously on research.

In conclusion, animals should have protection rights instead of having the same rights as humans. People should love animals and consider before using them on research.

Holt [Contributor] - / 8,801 2612  
Nov 23, 2018   #2
Tran, since you forgot to post the original prompt along with the essay response, I cannot give you any advice regarding the content of your essay. The most I can help you with at this point is with regards to your grammar and sentence structure problems. I wish that I could have given you a more in-depth review of your essay but without the original prompt, that is just impossible.

You are missing a comma after your conjunction reference in the sentence "... they are intelligent, and..." . There a few more errors regarding conjunction punctuation use, specifically to a missing comma after the conjunction in several sentences. The comma is always used to connect separate sentence references / thoughts in a paragraph. Don't get used to doing that though because its consistent use in any paragraph often results in run-on sentences, which has a relation to a reduced GRA score.

Please remember that your word choices matter in this essay. The way you present a sentence wording will indicate either clarity or confusion. So, when you say "can not", you confuse the reader. The word "can" indicates an ability to accomplish while the word "not" means to disagree or, as referenced in this sentence, be unable to accomplish something. When you say can not, that mean you can but also are unable to. That doesn't make sense. However, saying "cannot" means "being unable to" in a contracted form. The word "cannot" is a contraction that refers to being unable to accomplish as opposed to "can not" which does not make sense as I previously explained. Be mindful of this practice of yours as you appear to do this several times throughout this essay.

I won't review anything else for you at this point because I am unclear as to the original writing instructions. I will give you advice regarding content improvement next time. That is, if you remember to post the original prompt along with your response. Please remember to do that.

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