TED SUMMARY - jobs we'll lose to machines - and the ones we won't
Anthony Goldbloom told his worries about his niece, Yahli, 9 months old. She has parents with awesome professions, doctor and lawyer. But unfortunately, at the time she will register her college, she will see a different condition about a change in most of professions and jobs, machine will replace the jobs. In 1990 to 2010 machine starts to accommodate people jobs, such as sorting the letter by scanning the zip code or assessing the credit risks. It has been years the inventors try to conduct a research and invention to bring in a new and smarter machine. After couple years the sophisticated of machines go far more and result a high volume and frequent machine to replace human's task. For examples, reading million essay in a minute while a teacher read 10.000 millions for decades. Beside that other up-to-date machine that human cannot compare is diagnose million of eyes in a minute while the experts have a limit power to do that in a day. In next 20 years, machines will be greater and smarter which impossible to manpower to compete with. But, there are some occupations that even the best technology in the world cannot handle except human, for instance, tackle a novel situation, design a business strategy, do make a marketing campaign, and solve a problem. A machine cannot find a solution when a new problem comes up, it cannot create a strategy to attract the consumers or hold an event to do a campaign in front of public. So Anthony Goldbloom, suggest her niece to keep moving everyday and discovery the days, decide what she want to do and what she want to be without be afraid the machine will take all the opportunity she probably has.
Hi Rosa... I hope the followings will help.
But(you don't need to put "but") unfortunately,
Since you write about a Past event, please utilize "Simple Past Tense" instead of Future Tense (at the time she will register her college, she will see a .... In 1990 to 2010 machine starts to ...).
Please pay attention to the flow of your writing and its sense of meaning. Thank you.
Hello
You have a good summary
I have some corrections
Anthony Goldbloom told his worries about his niece,...
... awesome professions, which aredoctor and lawyer. But Thus, unfortunately, (...) her college, she will and see a (...) a change inthe most of professions ...
... to accommodate people jobs, such as which are sorting the ...
... sophisticated of machines go far more go further and theresult is a high volume and ...
But Thus, there are some occupations (...) except human, for instance there are several example,which are tackle a novel situation...
So Therefore, Anthony Goldbloom, suggest (...) and what she want to be without be afraid the machineand will take all the ...
You can added conjuction between the line and introduction in the first paragraph.
In FROM 1990 to 2010 [NEED COMMA] machine starts HAS STARTED to accommodate people jobs, ...
... try to conduct a research and BRING invention to bring in a FOR newER and smarter machineS. After A couple OF years [NEED COMMA] the sophisticated of machines MACHINE UPDATES go far more and resultED IN a high volume ...
For examples, reading IT CAN READ million essayS in a minute while a teacher IS ONLY ABLE TO read 10.000 millions for decades. Beside that [NEED COMMA] other up-to-date machine FUNCTION that human cannot compare is ABILITY TO diagnose million of ...
In THE next 20 years, (...) which impossible to FOR manpower to compete with. But,[AVOID STARTING SENTENCE WITH BUT] .....
So Anthony Goldbloom, IS GOING TO suggest her niece to (...) without be afraid THAT the machine will take all the opportunitIES she probably has
Hello, rosadesiana!
Your essay is good, but I would give you corrections
1. ... most of professions and jobs, the machine will replace the jobs. The noun phrase machine seems to be missing a determiner before it.
2. invention to bring in a new and smarter the machine. The noun phrase machine seems to be missing a determiner before it.
3. ... go far more and result in a high volume and frequent ... The phrase following the intransitive verb result seems to be missing a preposition.
4. For examples, reading million essay (essays ) in a minute while a teacher read 10.000 millions (million ) for decades. The singular noun essay follows a number other than one. Consider changing the noun to the plural form. It appears that the number millions is modifying a noun and should be in the singular form.
Thank you
