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A letter of application to the organisers. (IELTS TASK ONE)


Jimmy879873 26 / 55 13  
Nov 6, 2017   #1
You saw an advert in the newspaper asking for volunteers to help run a charity event.

Write a letter of application to the organisers. In your letter:

- explain why you are interested in helping
- give details suitable past experience
- suggest ways you might help with the event


becoming a part of your organisation



To Whom It May Concern:

I have been following your non-profit organisation because we have a common goal of helping people. I believe that given is better than receiving since I was a child. Today, I saw the advertisement that coming from you in looking for any volunteers to join and run its charity event, I then immediately write this letter to express my genuine and passionate feelings in becoming a part of it.

I was in Red Cross fundraising its money for disabled people in my community throughout my study in college. Most recently though, I participated a few charity events for its donations to poor people who are in need with foods and shelters.

I suggest my strong networking skills could notify people about your event. I assure you need that. I could also be a helper during the event too.

I hope you could consider my request and I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

CJ

Words: 161

Thanks!

bendaught 1 / 1 1  
Nov 6, 2017   #2
@Jimmy879873
There is a lot of corrections but I will just state one.

Second sentence:
Corrected sentence:
I believe that giving is better than receiving.
Holt - / 7,528 2001  
Nov 6, 2017   #3
CJ, you only accomplished the most minimal of word requirements to suit this test. When you limit the words that you write to only a little over the minimum count, you are not assuring yourself of passing this test. You are being scored on your grammar range and accuracy in this instance so you should try to write 200 words at the most, using a mix of complex and simple sentences. You can also stick to just simple sentence presentations such as you have at the moment. That can also work towards increasing your score, provided you try to write complete paragraphs instead of short 2 line sentences per paragraph. Write 3 sentences and you stand a good shot at a decent score. 5 sentences earns you the chance for maximum scoring consideration. This essay is very weak in presentation. Your grammar is not showing improvement at all. Even if I correct the whole letter for you, if you do not even try to improve on your own, then I don't see how all the help in the world can help you pass this test. Try to do more grammar exercises to help develop your English writing skills. Those are freely available online. You know the message of the instructions, it is your execution that is often faulty due to your limited English vocabulary and grammar skills.


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