Please help me to revise this argument. Thank you!
188. A new report suggests that men and women experience pain very
differently from one another, and that doctors should consider these
differences when prescribing pain medications. When researchers
administered the same dosage of kappa opioids-a painkiller-to 28 men and
20 women who were having their wisdom teeth extracted, the women reported
feeling much less pain than the men, and the easing of pain lasted
considerably longer in women. This research suggests that kappa opioids
should be prescribed for women whenever pain medication is required,
whereas men should be given other kinds of pain medication. In addition,
researchers should reevaluate the effects of all medications on men versus
women.
It seems that prescribing kappa opioids for women and giving other kinds of painkillers to men whenever pain medication is required are reasonable. However, the research result that the author incites to support his conclusion may be inaccurate. Besides, even though the pain medication has different effects on men versus women, it is not equal to that men and women would have a different responses after having other medications, let alone to reevaluate the effects of all medications on men versus women.
To begin with, even if the research result is reliable, we only know that kappa opioid takes effect in teeth pain. What about other kinds of pain? Headache, serious muscle strain, and heavy punch, etc. Will kappa opioids also function in those pains? If kappa opioid is an exclusive pain medication for teeth pain, or kappa opiod may have little effect in other pains, it would be a bad suggestion for women to take kappa opiod as pain medication when they suffer other kinds of pains.
In addition, in this argument we know nothing about other painkillers. Will other painkillers take a great advantage over kappa opioid on men? It is equally possible that other kinds of painkillers will bear a better effect in curing pain on men. In that case, it would be unwisely for the doctors to prescribe kappa opioid for men when they are in physically pain.
However, the research result about kappa opioid deserves doubts. Some possibilities may make the result unreliable. Firstly, the participants in the research may not be statistically significant in number and the respondents may not be representative enough to reflect overall reaction on men and women when having kappa opioids. Secondly, the willpower may play an extremely important role in enduring the pain. It is entirely possible that the pain women feel are the same or less than the men because of the strong willpower women generally possess. For this reason, they reported less pain but virtually not. Without ruling out these possible reasons, the author cannot place full confidence on the research result.
Finally, is it necessary for researchers to reevaluate the effects of all medications on men versus women? We know the only fact that doctors should consider the differences that men and women experience pain very differently from one another when prescribing pain medications, but what about other medications? Do men and women will also react different by taking other medications? Common sense informs us that doctors seldom prescribe medications for men and women separately. They simply give patients who are diagnosed with the same symptoms the same medication, and only in some illnesses doctors prescribe respectively on men versus women. Consequently, it is obvious that not all medications have different effects on men and women.
Overall, before prescribing kappa opioids on men and women, the researchers need to carefully scrutinize the research results, and they need to consider whether kappa opioids are suitable for all other pains. Besides, they also need to provide evidence to demonstrate whether kappa opioid is the best painkiller for men. Also useful would be information about the necessity to reevaluate the effects of all medications on men versus women. After considering the above facts, the conclusion may seem more convincing.
The scope of your arguments is good. You hit on the key error in the prompt, the words "whenever pain medication is required," and gave several reasons why that is not a valid conclusion from the data at hand.
In addition to the limited kind of pain and kind of medication studied, you might also have noted the relatively small sample size and raised the question of the age and ethnicity of the participants, as these too have been shown to be associated with differential rates of synthesis/uptake of certain medications. With a sample size that small, it's impossible for a wide range of ages and ethnicities to have been adequately represented.
That's a minor point. More troublesome is the organization -- or, rather, lack of organization of this essay. Did you outline first? Do that, in order to make sure that your introduction adequately states your thesis and that your arguments flow in a logical order.
