IELTS 12 Test 5 writing task 2
Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, scientific research become both important and valuable. Some of the information is vital and wroth to be shared. However the problem is that should the information be shared freely as much as possible?
To start with, people supporting to share more information freely think that important scientific research information must be convinced to people. Scientists should share their information so others can check their research results. If they don't share the information, the vital research may not be replicated. The more error and problems would cause. Moreover, the strongest argument is often the academic freedom. Academics institutes and universities should have responsibilities to spread information as the education purposes.
On the other hand, other people think that there some situations should be limited. The first situation is business. Some companies have invested a lot of money and resources to get the research information so they always apply for the patents to protect it before they really make any profit on it . Another situation is about the country security. Some scientific research is about weapon , governments may keep these research secretly to protect the safety of their country. A other related point is timing,that the release of the information is controlled by the owner of that information. For example, the inventor, researcher or investor should have a period where they can take advantages on this knowledge for themselves before releasing it. Scientific research into drugs and medicine is a good example of this.
In conclusion, the arguments for the freedom of information in science and academic is good for the academic activities. However, when it comes to business issue or country security, the release of information should be restricted. Therefore, I partly support both of views.
I have some comments to your writing.
First, in addressing this prompt, you should clearly state your opinion, on what extent do you agree/disagree. Then write your opinion on both views. You can give your opinion right after paraphrasing the prompt in first paragraph, so that the examiner will easily get your point of view.
Second, there are many errors in your essay, such as:
people think that there are some situations that should be limited
This is just for example. You can check your grammar first, do not practice in a rush.
Best of luck!
Holt Educational Consultant - / 13,013 4242
Jia, your response to the prompt is incorrect and will result in a failing score during the actual test. This is a 2 public point of view essay with a personal opinion attachment. the way that you wrote the essay, you turned it into a personal point of view observation of the two reasons stated in the original prompt. That shows that you did not understand the discussion instructions in any way. Such a mistake will definitely cost you during the test. In addition to that, you are never supposed to post a question at the end of a thesis statement. You are supposed to offer an understanding of the discussion instructions instead. Also, you must avoid using the exact phrases from the original discussion in the paraphrase since the point of the first paragraph is to test your English understanding and restatement skills. Therefore, this essay cannot expect to get a passing score in an actual setting.
The minute you hear the term "Some people" and 'Others believe", that is automatically a 2 public point of view discussion with the third paragraph being your personal opinion. For your personal opinion, you must choose a side to support between the two public pov. Your reasoning should be based upon your belief in one of the two public discussions and your ability to offer additional supporting discussions to strengthen that point of view.