Q: Some educationists argue that non-exam, arts-based subjects such as music, drama, art, and craft should be compulsory in the secondary-school curriculum. They believe that activities such as these can improve overall academic performance.
Secondary-school is the crucial stage amidst all educational phases. On account of this, some educationalists argue that non-exam, arts-based subjects included music, drama, art and craft should be considered in the curriculum to enhance their academic performance. Personally, I firmly agree with this statement thanks to pupils' brain-balancing and their broaden horizon.
Arts-besed classes are be able to improve overall academic rate for the students. This is because these core competences is not as difficult as the exam-based subjects like math, english, and so on. This statement is parallel with the contemporary study conducted by the University of Queensland in 2015. They found that 87% school that applying this methode could obtain their grade by students achievement in the national olympiad nearly twofold than the preciding year. Thus clear that, such arts subjects can lead the overall rank become better.
In addition, arts disciplines will useful for the pupils to balance their right-and-left-side brian. As such, all kind of arts is the job for the right hemisfer while the other logic-subjects is the left-brain's task. What is more, these kind of competences will expand their knowledge. The more insight that are given to the students, the wider opportunity they will broaden their horizon.
The aforementioned evidence shows that there are a large number of merits are be able attained by the secondary-school students by studying arts disciplines including to increase academic grade, balancing brain's performnce, and obtaining a wider knowladge. On account of this, I highly likely suggest to the related stakeholder to consider it as a compulsory subject in secondary-school curriculum.
Your writing is a good job.
However, I would give you suggestions to improve this. I found some of your mistakes
the crucial stage
amidst OF all educational phases.
On account of this, some
educationalists EDUCATORS argue
.Personally, I firmly agree with this statement thanks to pupils' brain-balancing and
their broaden BROADENING horizon.(AFTER USING THANKS TO/ DUE TO/ BECAUSE OF/, YOU HAVE TO WRITE NOUN SO THAT VERB SHOULD BE CHANGED TO GERUND) Arts-besed ART-BASED classes are be able to improve overall academic rate for OF the students OVERALL. (YOU SHOULD PLACE ADVERB APPROPRIATELY)
This is because these core competences
is ARE not as difficult as the exam-based subjects like math , AND english , and so on .
They found that 87% OF THE NUMBER OF schoolS that applying this
preciding PRECEDING year. Thus clear that , such arts subjects can lead the overall rank TO become better.
job for the right hemisfer (??????) while the other logic-subjects is the left brain's task. What is more, these kind of
competences COMPETENCIES will expand their knowledge.
compulsory subject in THE secondary-school curriculum.
Fudla, you often make misspellings. I hope you read this writing more before you upload on this website. On the other hand, you passed explanation of the example which supported your idea in the second body paragraph. I believe you could enhance your writing on condition that you always read the examples of writing.