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It is astonishing that people keep in circling in their comfort zone and avoid life variation


SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Feb 26, 2014   #1
I was posted the same prompt in several days ago. But have unsatisfied with my writing. Here I try to make the newest with the different explanation. I hope for some member especially who followed my progress can give me enlightening advices. Thanks in advance :)

People naturally resist making changes in their lives. What kind of problems can cause this? What solution you suggest? Give the reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is astonished that people keep in circling in their comfort zone and avoid life variation, whether world changing force most of inhabitant to take a challenge. Obviously, it is keen to aligned several causes related to this problem to find solutions. I tend to explain those, cause and solutions, in the following paragraph.

To begin with, keeping stays in the circumstance may be caused by people mentality. For example, there are some graduated students who favor applying in local university rather than enrolled in international college overseas. This evidence may indicate as fearlessness to adapt with different weather, lifestyle, meal, and environment which opposite with he(she) origins. Moreover, pleasure tendency may be stood as the other background in resistant people. While the others forced their self to defeat time for making change, resist people who have pleasure embryo usually keep staying in their convenient boundaries and not to try other possibilities for challenging themselves. For instance, a loyal civil servant earns 2 million IDR salaries monthly for 20 years her (his) job without trying another income.

Therefore, after several causes which may relate to resist in changing challenge; the possible solutions can be sought. People should be eager to face different kind of life disturbance; it kind of adaptation patterns. Sometimes the solution of our fearfulness is just braving to try or not. Taking baby walk as an example; the toddler should experiences several suffering, injury, and braise before well-walking. Nowadays do walking for adult is not being problem anymore. Likewise, anchoring our mind in positive way is another suggestion which I may mentioned. Due to this positivity, the nightmare can be became sweet dream. For example, the trekker who thinks hiking as the interesting way and easy to do commonly showed better performance rather than others who think hiking as such obstacles they could not pass.

In conclusion, while being resistant influence several people, as part of society we should seek far behind what causes this problem in order to suggest some solutions to help people with this difficulties.

Pahan 1 / 1,907 553  
Feb 27, 2014   #2
I was posted the same prompt in several days ago. But have unsatisfied with my writing. Here I try to make the newest with the different explanation. I hope for some member especially who followed my progress can give me enlightening advices. Thanks in advance :)

No worries :D .... Here I am agian :D
It is astonished that people keep in circling in their comfort zone and avoid life variation, whether world changing force most of inhabitant to take a challenge.

The second part sounds pretty confusing and tends to destroy the effect of the first part :(

Obviously, it is keen to alignedalign several causes related to this problem to find solutions. ... what does this mean? Not clear :(
Do the hook, background and thesis... that's what most important!
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Feb 27, 2014   #3
Hi
I have an admin request - You should open all IELTS essay task threads in Writing Feedback forum which is the appropriate forum for them. This has been opened in Essay term papers forum and we moved it to the right forum. I have seen some of your other essays too have been opened in wrong forums and I wish you take this fact into your serious consideration. This is a forum rule that you need to comply with. Please take care of your threads!
OP SHanafi 120 / 415 93  
Feb 27, 2014   #4
is has been opened in Essay term papers forum and we moved it to the right forum.

I am so sorry, I just know this rule. Yap, in my next writing I will do it :)


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