Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

Writing Task 1: average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in four countries

Arlen 20 / 40 3  
Jan 9, 2017   #1
The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.

average carbon dioxide (CO2) spread in different world areas

The provided line chart illustrates the average emission of the CO2 per person in four European countries for a 40 year period beginning in 1967.
In detail, the CO2 emission in the United Kingdom and Sweden had decreased. Especially in Sweden, besides the markedly lift between 1967 and 1977, it had dropped from 9 to near 5.5 metric tonnes in 40 years. On the other hand, the graph depicts the steadily growth of CO2 emission in Italy and Portugal. The former grew from 4 to almost 8 metric tonnes and the later was 5 times as much a in 1967 as in 2007.

We can observe from the chart that the CO2 emissions in four countries were quite apart originally, but in the year of 2007, the number became closer and closer. Interestingly, in 2007, the average CO2 emission in the UK was equal to that in Portugal.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,876 4563  
Jan 9, 2017   #2
Arlen, your report summary is good, but it could have been better. You merely restated the facts as it was presented in the chart that you were given to analyze. However, the proper and more complete approach to the report presentation would have been if you did a complete comparison analysis of the provided information. Note how the lines in the chart intermingle and overlap one another at certain points? Those are the comparison points that should have been included in your discussion. By presenting those comparison aspects, the essay would have been more informative and would have easily met the paragraph development requirements in the final presentation. Remember how each paragraph has to have at least 3 sentences in it? Look at your essay, you missed a few sentences in paragraphs 1 and 2. The conclusion of the examiner will then be that the information that you are providing is incomplete. He would be right if he assumed that because you did not properly develop the accurate summary report of this illustrative chart.
Streetwalker 9 / 39 14  
Jan 9, 2017   #3
A little inputs for the beginning.

The provided line chart illustrates compares the trend average of emission of the CO2 emissions (...) countries for over a 40 year period beginning in start from 1967 to 2007.

Hope it helps.


Home / Writing Feedback / Writing Task 1: average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in four countries