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We have to balance between learning second language and other subjects.


frt427 1 / -  
Feb 1, 2015   #1
All children should study a foreign language in school starting in the earliest grade. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement.

School is basic foundation of knowledge being imparted to a people. Some people consider that learning second language should be taught to children in the earliest grade. I would argue that this has both positive and negative implications.

Learning second language is not the only important lesson which should be taught in the childhood because there are other subjects are more important at the age. Math and Science are more important lessons than learning second language. Taking British children as an example, they prefer to learn Math and Science rather than second language, which has career prospects and financial gain in the future. In addition, learning mother tongue language is the most important lesson which have to be taught to the children rather than second language because learning second language could delay the development of children's first language. It is thus clear that learning a new language takes a long time and definitely consumes the school children's time. In fact, children may encounter numerous problems when trying to distinguish their mother tongue from the second language. Therefore, at the age, it is vital for the children to develop their first language and to study Math and Science instead of foreign language.

On the other hand, I would argue that there are also undeniable benefits of learning second language in the earliest grade. Firstly, children who learn foreign language in the earliest grade tend to learn faster than adult. Because, they will be enthusiastic to know new knowledge in their lives. Taking children in China as an example, according to the survey, about 47.38 percent of the children first get in touch with English learning materials when they were 3 to 6 years old. In addition, although 90 percent of the parents believe that learning Chinese and traditional culture is more important than English, their children still pay more attention to the study of English than Chinese. As a result, Children who learn second language in the earliest grade may not shy to pronounce an accent like a native speaker, may enjoy communicating with their friends in other language and also they will be easy in remembering new vocabularies. Additionally, scientists have discovered that learning second language will help brain more active and response more quickly. Hence, children who learn second language from childhood will be fluent to speak second language in the future and also it is necessary for future development of each country.

To sum up, it is clear to me that although there are advantages of learning second language in the childhood, there are also drawbacks. We have to balance between learning second language and other subjects. Although it is important of learning second language in the earliest grade, first language is still learned and used by the children.

fadlanmuzakki 15 / 49 36  
Feb 1, 2015   #2
Hi Frt247 , I would like to give several comments and suggestions for your writing.

GRAMMAR ISSUES

a people

I suggest that you should be consistent with Subject Verb Agreement inasmuch as "people" is a plural noun and "a" is an article to singular noun.

so that it should be = people or a person

the most important lesson which have to be taught

lesson is a singular noun so you should use "has" after which, or maybe you can change lesson to be lessons

there are also undeniable benefits of learning second

I utterly believe that "of" is not collocate with benefits, so you should change to be "for" = benefits for (you can presumably check your collocation dictionary)

to learn faster thanadult

you should put an article before "adult", or you can probably change adult to be adults / the adult (if "adult" has been mentioned in your previous sentence)

they will be easy in remembering new vocabularies

in is not collocate with easy, you can us preposition "for" or "about" (check your dictionary)

language [quote=frt427]language in the future and also it is

and also they will be easy[/quote]
do not you think that these are redundant expressions?

FLOW AND IDEA

Overall, your idea is good whereas there are several sentences which make me confused. Thus, I have some suggestion for you.

School is basic foundation of knowledge being imparted to a people. Some people consider that learning second language should be taught to children in the earliest grade. I would argue that this has both positive and negative implications .

your idea in the first paragraph / introduction sentence is not clear. the essay question is about agree or disagree but you quote that this has positive and negative implication. Hence, I think that your idea in the first paragraph is Out Of Topic.

this my introduction sentence if I should write this :
Foreign language subjects in schools have generated a great deal of discussion. for this reason, some people think that international language should be learned by students starting in the beginning level of their education as it can impact on their later development. While such an idea has alarmed a group of teachers who have taken up against the perception as they think that foreign language can decrease a sense of patriotism, I would support the argument of learning international language from the beginning inasmuch what elementary students need in this age of globalization for facing the world is learning international languages such as English, French or Germany language.

To sum up, it is clear to me that although there are advantages of learning second language in the childhood, there are also drawbacks. We have to balance between learning second language and other subjects. Although it is important of learning second language in the earliest grade, first language is still learned and used by the children .

As a matter of fact, I hate to say this but I should. your conclusion paragraph is completely Out Of Topic inasmuch as the question does not ask you about advantages and disadvantages. Nevertheless, you should put your strong argument whether you agree or disagree with the statement in the question. As far as I am concerned, your essay does not mention agree or disagree at all.

However, you can correct me if I wrong in my comments for your essay. The last comment, you should never throw in the towel to improve my writing.

KEEP STUDY, KEEP SPIRIT.


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